EX breaks up with rebound - finace'

[newts]

Just a little update on my ex. 11 mths ago my ex and I broke up (his decision) 2 days later he started seeing somebody new and 7 weeks later they were engaged - during this whole he time he maintained contact with me (both good and bad) I cut the contact with him as soon as I found out he was engaged.

 

He kept trying to contact me after I asked him not to for 5 mths I ignored him. After I felt I was ready to cope with contact again I started to answer his calls. He told me how miserable he was and they didn't have sex etc and she was very cold etc... asked me to have an affair with him... Of course I said no! He also asked me to start contacting him for a change and again I said no!

 

Every 6 weeks or so he would ring with some sob sorry about his relationship and the last time I answered his calls he had just had yet another fight with her and wanted to see if I would be interested in starting again.... again I said no, and made a decision to stop answering his calls.

 

He has called a few times and I have ignored him, last niht he called again and curiosity got the better of me. He has broken up with his Fiance', and now after he tried to reconcil, she has told him she doesn't want him.

 

I said to him, I could have told you 11 months ago this wasn't going to work, he said why? my answer because you were constantly in contact with me throughout this whole relationship, telling me how you still love me and think about me all the time. His response "I was in love with 2 people, you can be in love with 2 people at the same time you know... I said, no I don't know, when you get engaged to someone it's because you want to spend the rest of your life with that 1 person. He looked at me blankly (lol, I am so glad I am not in a relationship with him anymore).

 

He is devastated... he also told me they broke off their engagement 4 months ago, and just lived together. They have only been apart for 3 weeks, so the feeling are so fresh. He came over to my house, he seems to be doing o.k. The thing is, I haven't seen him for 9 months and I was worried how I would feel when I saw him. I felt nothing!! Just remember all of you that are hurting and that have been betrayed by an ex, you do get over them, even if you think you wont. I have done so much work on myself and am finally happy with who I am and I think that is the key, I do things for me now and am not allowing myself to be a prisoner of my own emotions.

 

We do get over our exes if we are willing to, life does go on, just be kind to yourself and love you first!

[luciddreamer]

Good for you!

Sounds like you are being strong.

I dated someone who didn't know where he stood... it was agonizing. Hope something good comes your way soon.

[Relationship Coach]

Good for you Newts, glad to see you've made it to the other side. Now harness that strength and power and never let go. Glad to see you share the bright side of your story with everyone.

 

RC

[newts]

Thanks guys, I'm actually not being strong, no effort was needed, there were no feelings or attraction there at all. I even surprised myself as I thought I might have had to pretend to be cool about seeing him - nothing, absolutely nothing!