Re: Totally over?...Maybe not!

[lady_android]

Hi there people..

I would like to share my problems with you guys. Ok, I've been in a 7-year relationship and my boyfriend broke up with me 4mos. ago. What's hurts me most is that it was after our ANNIVERSARY and before my BIRTHDAY! He told me that his feelings continue to lessen and he wouldn't want to lie to me anymore. 1 week after the break-up I found out that he has another girl! Then one of his friends confide to me that they've been together even before our break-up. OUCH! in short, he two-timed me. Oh and just for the record, he did it to me twice already. For the first two months I was able to recover from it but as time passes, I'm starting to realize that its not very easy to get over him. There are times that he would call me up and say that he misses me...I would really want to forget about him but I'm very close to his family and to some of his friends too. He's the only person I've ever loved...But my mind's been tellin me to let him go because my friends told me that he's not worth it. I do miss him a couple of times but I guess everybody passes through that stage...The thing is, I'm really bothered..because he would call me up and text me sometimes which I don't want him to do. i still love him, I'm still hurtin'...everytime I talk to him I just get disappointed because I always say to him that I've always wished him well so I'm hoping that he'll be doing the same for me but he would be tellin me that he still loves me and that he misses me so much, you know, those kinds of stuff! I think that he shouldn't be tellin me those things because it would be very hard for me to move on. He just won't let me be..and until now he hasn't admitted to me yet of what he did and I haven't got any apologies from him too, instead he would blame me for being so jealous and unappreciative before when we were still together. Its like his defense mechanism for his guilt. I don't know what else to do, his attitude is starting to irritate me and I'm losing my grip...HELP!!!

[Australia]

Hi

 

Sorry to hear about your broken relationship and sadness. I understand what you are going through. Almost all of us in this web site have gone through such things in our lifetime. Accept it to be normal and it is not only you.

 

First of all, you must try to protect yourself from falling into this sadness after he called you or text you. To do this, you should avoid picking up his phone call and deleting all his text messages to your mobile.

 

Don't feel sorry for yourself from doing this, since the person that shoul be sorry is him as you stated in your story.

 

It will be hard during this few weeks or months for you, especially after being in a seven-years relationship together. But please try not to be alone, see if you could talk to someone such as your friend, family etc...

 

As he had cheated you twice, then it is time for him to wake up that you no longer want him. Eventually one day, someone will treat him like he treat you!

 

Try to move on being single and you will find more happiness than to grief over such person. Life is short, so enjoy being yourself, until you find someone who will treat you the way you want.

 

Good luck with your recovery...

[winkie]

MY EX DID THE SAME THING, WE BROKE UP BECAUSE HE NEEDED HIS FREEDOM AND THE WHOLE TIME HE WOULD CALL AND TELL ME HE MISSED ME, LOVED ME AND WE WOULD EVENTUALLY GET MARRIED. I ASKED HIM NUMEROUS AMOUNTS OF TIMES TO STOP CALLING ME AND HE DID NOT LISTEN. WELL THROUGHOUT ALL OF THIS I FOUND OUT HE WAS BEING WITH SOMEONE ELSE AND THAT HE WAS WITH HER WHEN WE WERE TOGETHER. YOU CANT LET SOMEONE DO THAT TO YOU. PLEASE CHANGE YOUR # OR DELETE THE TEXTS DONT ANSWER THE PHONE. AS FOR HIS FAMILY REMEMBER THEY ARE HIS FAMILY AND IF YOU CANT SEE THEM WITHOUT HURTING YOURSELF YOU MAY HAVE TO LET GO. I KNOW IT IS HARD BUT YOU CANT LET HIM TREAT YOU LIKE THAT. I ASKED MYSELF WHEN I WAS GOING THROUGH ALL THIS WHAT WOULD HE HAVE DONE IF I CHEATED ON HIM AND THE ANSWER WAS SIMPLE HE WOULD NEVER TALK TO ME AGAIN SO THAT WAS IT. I LET GO AND YES IT WAS HARD AND IT HAS BEEN ALMOST A YEAR AND I OCCASIONALLY THINK OF HIM BUT I KNOW THAT HE IS NOT THE ONE FOR ME. YOU CANNOT BE WITH SOMEONE THAT ONLY HAS THEMSELVES IN MIND IT IS NOT FAIR TO YOU. YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE THAT HOLDS THE KEY TO YOUR FUTURE PLEASE GIVE IT TO SOMEONE WHO IS WORTH IT.

PLEASE READ.............

ARE YOU A REASON,

A SEASON, OR A LIFETIME?

Pay attention to what you read. After you read this, you will know the reason it was sent to you! People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each person.

 

When someone is in your life for a REASON. . . It is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.

 

Then people come into your life for a SEASON. Because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.

 

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons: things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.