can i win her back?

[2xtreme182]

hi im anthony 17 sydney australia..about one year ago i met this girl we were great friends from the start staying up late every night talking on the phone hanging out all da time etc...then i finally got the balls to ask her out and she said yes we went out for a total of four months and 16 days and she was the best gf i ever had i loved her so much id do anything for her and i was her first aswell so i could tell she really cared for me deply...

what happened when we broke up was that she kept hangin out with this other bloke named johnny all da time cos she just joined a new school and i think she was a big hit with the guys she ended up dumping me..and refused to give me a reason she just kept saying "i fell out of love" i dont believe that at all...she started playing so many games saying she still loved me and then saying she hated me it drove me crazy she eventually told me she needed space and wanted to be single a week later she goes out with johnny...and there still together i kept ringing her tellling her i love her and how much i miss her and everything and she stopped calling me and she started becoming really really mean to me not careing about how i felt at all she was so cruel the things she said....cos i never ever did anything to her i was the perfect boyfriend i treated her so good man i had had enough i started goign crazy i missed her so much and i wanted her back so bad she didnt care at all she just basickly said f*** off then everythime i tried calling her she would make upo anexcuse and say she was busy....we didnt talk for about a month and it was killing me i got so angry and i sent her messages saying i was gonna bash johnny and all this stuff (which is very unlike me) and she just told me to bring it on i just left it a week and then rang her and said lets talk about this she said i just cant be friends with my ex's...i got angry and hung up then she rung back a week later and said hello....that was it though that was all it took for me to start chasing her again i just saw her the other day it was a bit weird but now shes calling me and stuff and she said that johnny has changed

wat is she doing does she want me back or is she playing games with me again

can i get her back? ive been in severe depression ever since we broke off i know it sounds stupid cos im only 17 but i cant help the way i feel we broke up 4 months ago but i still love her.. someone please help me i feel like i cant go on without her..is she just messing with me cos she misses the attention will she regret wat she did to me? please someone help...

and id like to thank the ppl who run this site its very nice of you to be there for completer strangers all the time thankyou so much

[Heretic]

The problem is you're far too clingy. You need to relax, there are other fish in the sea. Lots of people on this board are "waiting" for their ex's to come back, but you're taking it a bit far. You really have no right to threaten someone and you shouldn't call someone constantly telling them you love them when they are with someone else. That's just wrong.

 

You said this isn't like you, well that's good because this kind of behavior is really improper. If she drives you to these ends I think you should look for another girl, she's not good for you.

 

However I don't know all the details so... If you do want to get back together with her, be there for her. DO NOT bad mouth johnny. Let her vent and just smile and nod. DO NOT tell her you love her unless she asks. She's probably very hurt and confused, you need to understand that even if you do all these things she might not gow out with you right away, and even if she does it might be just for a while.

 

You have to understand part of being a good boyfriend is not being jealous and giving a girl space when she asks for it. Not to mention being happy for her when she's found someone else.

 

I hope you understand and I really hope you consider finding someone else she's turning you into someone you don't want to be.

[2xtreme182]

maybe ur right..but u see i was only ringint her and stuff and telling her i loved her because she was playing her immature games telling me she still loves me

for the first few weeks she was with johnny she was telling me she loved me and she was making a mistake..

i cant just get over her for some reason i just cant do it i need her to care about me the way she used to i cant explain the impact this relationship had on my life im so badly hurt now i serously hate my life cos i didnt do anything wrong and this happens... well thanks for all your help

[Heretic]

I think what you need to know and what she's been telling you is that SHE DOES STILL CARE ABOUT YOU

 

She does love you still but that doesn't mean she wants to be with you. Love is a very strange but powerful emotion and one day you'll truly understand it. I think in the meantime maybe you should find someone else and just be there for her. If she wants a relationship she'll let you know. Otherwise you need to take your mind off her so you don't do or say anything else you'll regret later.

 

Good Luck.

[2xtreme182]

yeh but shes told me she doesnt love me and the onyl reason were friends is cos i rang her up like an idiot practically begging to be friends...she loved me so much when we were togethere and now its just nothing at all...i just want her to care about me like she used to...

 

thankyou so much for your help

[johnnyt]

wow something very similar happened with me and my ex, except that the guy called johnny in your story was called Dave! I'm Johnny!

 

oh well.

[shari186]

You can win any woman back that truly loves you!

[johndmoore1]

Hello Anthony,

 

I read your post and wanted to chime in. I realize that this must be a very difficult time - but let me assure you that you are not alone with your feelings. All of us at one time or another have had to deal with a breakup and it is never easy. What is important now is that you focus on your life, your needs and your feelings. Start to become selfish and concentrate on those things that make you happy. I don't usually post on these boards, but your post caught my attention so I wanted to show some support. If you get the chance, visit my website as it contains some helpful reading in my reading room.

 

Best,

 

John D. Moore, MS, CADC

Author of Confusing Love with Obsession

link removed

[MissyJ]

Do you really want someone back who has hurt you or could say those things to you?