No formal breakup, going to date… is this cheating?

[angel_girl]

Here is my story...I used to love him, used to care for him, used to chase him just to workout our problems. It's been almost 10 months that we're together, and I used to do everything just to make him happy. We've been thru lots of arguments, we broke up twice, he always gets me back, again when things slow down, I do the chasing and everything went fine. I admit I love him so badly.

 

Its been almost two weeks of no contact, again - no phone call, no email, no hangout, he is like this ever since, he will just disappear so suddenly, leaving me so clueless of what was going on with him.

 

Now suddenly I got tired of chasing him, got tired of knowing what is wrong with him, got tired of working things out. He just lives just 10 minutes away from me, and I know I'm tired to go over his place. Meaning I don't want to talk to him anymore. He doesn't do any effort to save our relationship. Why should I care?

 

No breakup, no closure but I'm ready to have a blind date next week. I'm pretty sure it will be very complicated. I feel like I 'm going to cheat on him cause we have no formal breakup, but for me it is obvious that he doesn't care anymore. I have to move on.

 

Does anyone have experienced the same situation like mine?

 

Would you consider this cheating if I started to date somebody without a formal breakup? I guess I just don't want to be the villain of the story, what should I do? Please help!

[djedix]

I'd go over find out what's going on... Confront him.

 

Then dump him if you can't stand to be with him anymore, and tell him why you are doing it.

 

Then do whatever you want.

[lillady898]

Call him up and formally break it off. It's the fairest thing to do, for both you and him. Go on your date and have fun with someone who'll treat you right.

[lunatic]

Break up with this guy now. It sounds like he thinks your going to chase him again like always. If your done with him and the relationship then either call him or send him a letter. Why should you have to go out of YOUR way when he just up and dissappeared on you. Screw that send him a letter telling him how you feel and then go out on your date!

[Meow18]

I agree with the others. I would officially dump him before dating.

 

If your blind date finds out that you still have a boyfriend, he might not even give you a chance. And you could miss out on someone who is worth more than your current boyfriend.

 

I wouldn't exactly consider it cheating. You plan to break up with the guy anyway right? If you do go on this other date, make sure that you actually do break up with your boyfriend, cause if you decide not to break up with him, then I would consider it cheating.

[Lidancer]

I've had the same thing happen to me. just no contact for periods of time then he texts and says how bad he wants me back prolly just so he can get some action. but i'd say try calling him and see what's going on. if he is like my guy who didn't answer his phone then he's just avoiding u and he's done and he knows it. if u know he's gonna be somewhere then u go and bump into him and see how he reacts to u and talk t o him about what's going on. otherwise if u dont know he's gonna be somewhere and he doesnt answer his phone then too bad for him. ur DONE!

[DazzlingEyes]

It sounds like he has already broken up with you, if he disappeared and hasn't called in two weeks. It's one thing if he told you that he needs a break from you, but he didn't. If you know in your heart that you don't want to be with this man, then don't be with him. Personally I feel different than everyone else. I don't think he deserves a "formal" break-up from you. Just leave. But again, if you feel like you are not ready to leave, then that's another issue. I feel you should go out on the date, and then take it from there. And just don't go out on that one date. You should date many guys. Have fun! It's obvious that your boyfriend doesn't deserve you. He is not reciprocating enough. A relationship goes both ways. You two should be running towards each other, not you only running to him. You deserve better treatment than what he is giving you. Once he sees that you are not hunting him down, he will either try to come back to you or he will move on. And if he comes back, then you have to make a decision if you are going to trust him again or not. If he moves on, then you will see that he didnt want the relationship anyway. And one more thing, men do not like to be hunted down. Its a major turn-off.