Am I Straight, or a Lesbain, I'm so confused.

[Gothic-Butterflies]

I use to like boys, I really did.

I know for sure now that I'm different but I still try so I can be the prefect kid my parents always wanted.

So I look at boys whom I use to think were "hot" or attractive but they just aren't anymore.

So now I'm pretty sure I'm a lesbian but I'm not sure how to tell my parents since they're really against the whole lesbian thing.

Last time I told someone it was my (ex) best-friend who blurbed about it to the whole school.

So for an intire half-year I had to with stand the dirty looks and deny the questions, I still wasn't really sure back then.

So I guess my question is, how do I speak up how do let other people know?

 

~ Rachel

[Jonboy582]

Ok, you are only 13 you willbe feeling may emotions right now, and the chances are you probably are not a lesbian. You just experiimenting. You have not yet said if you are actualy attracted to girls?. Also if you are a lesbian that is you and part of who you are, if/ when you let your parents know, make sure they know that fact. Tell then you have known for a year or so and you were no different then so why would u be any different now they know.

 

And as I said just cos your not finding blokes attractive at themo doesnt mean your gay. When I was13 I did not really find many girls attractive, but I did not call my self gay.

[Jinx]

I'll run through my usual input on the am I or am I not, then address your question.

 

At 13 hormones and highlights of attraction fluctuate massively. I know mine did excessively during the early teens, took me awhile before they settled down enough and I could make a final judgment. I believe what you must address is, is it a factor of male lacking in the look and personality wise? If so, I think we all go through a period no matter the orientation where crushes and interest is not there, minimal or entirely different. The element of being a lesbian as I preach is having all ways of attraction. Physical, Mental, Romantic, Relationship.

 

If it is strictly Physical I'd say its probably more of a Bisexual case or hormones attacking anything with two legs as that phase comes and goes through the teen years.

 

Now if there is the interest to commit to a relationship and have romance and friendship beyond a strictly physical level, then I'd say its more likely. Far too often it is strictly physical attraction in the light of someone is, "Hot" for lack of a better term to fit here, but nothing more. That doesn't do much, I'm sure there are those which disagree but that is my personal viewpoint on it.

 

Anyhow, if you feel you meet every aspect, and you feel ready, do that slowly and work with it. If parents are homophobic, you have to choose between telling, their finding out, OR not letting onto it period. Same with friends and others, unless you know someone is comfortable with it, well then you're taking a risk.

[Gothic-Butterflies]

Okay, thanks for all your help.

[cichlid]

Ah, teen years. I would not try to figure out if you are hetereosexual or homosexual just yet. A lot of people your age tend to decide they are bisexual, then go to hetereosexual later in life. I worked with a chick that was a "lesbian"...now she has a boyfriend. Go figure. Don't put a label on yourself just yet because you may find yourself knowing pretty sure you are straight when you thought for sure you were a lesbian.

[metallicachica247]

tell them that if they cant accept that you are lesbian, then, they arent accepting you for who you are.