Feeling weird...please help

[koolaidnovel]

I'm 18 and I'm very inexperienced...except for my boyfriend now, who is my first relationship. I've been with my boyfriend for about 2 months, and we've made out...which involved a lot of kissing, him feeling me up, and me just touching his back, lower back, chest, etc. under the clothes. It didn't go farther than that. Besides him touching my breasts, nothing else went on. He used to feel around my underwear line, etc. but nothing went on. I did the same to him just because I thought it made him feel good. Then during a make out session, his hand went lower down into my panties, and he asked me if i wanted him to ...and i said, 'yes'. It seemed like not a big deal...although i was wondering why he would want to...(weird, i guess) because of the hair and all. ? I dunno, it just seems unappealing to want to do that...but he fingered me...and it made me feel really weird. Maybe embarrassed...maybe just not ready...I don't know what made me feel weird. I know I am capable of enjoying something like that, but for some reason, it didn't feel right. So...I suppose I made a mistake in saying 'yes'. He noticed it was awkward afterwards and he apoligized many times, and it's less awkward now. I guess I'm just wondering...why did I feel so weirded out by it, and how can I feel better? Also, I HATE myself for the fact that I said 'yes'...I think at the time, I didn't feel a disagreement against it. But WHY did I say 'yes', if I was thinking 'no'??? God, I am confused right now.

[MaxPayne19]

Dont get such a big head over it, we all go through mistakes like that. Just tell your boyfriend to take things more slowly and just let things develop on their own. You probably got really uncomfortable cuz you thought too much about it and you were unsure about your decision. Your boyfriend shouldnt feel offended if you say no. Its always important to dicuss about what feels good and doesnt in a relationship because you can work it out together.

[soon2bfamous]

dont worry about it. honestly, at least your boyfriend asked you. many times when i didnt feel comfortable with a guy touching me down town. id have to remove his hand. your guy sounds like a great person. dont hate youself for saying yes. its not like there was any great amount of harm done, i promise. just keep talking with him and let him knkow when you really are ready.

[koolaidnovel]

Hey maxpayne and soon2befamous, thanks! Both of your replies honestly made me feel better.

[goddess23]

think about it: its alwasy weird the first time! i mean think about the first kiss...did it really go that well? or even the first couple of times. if you feel that you're not ready then thats good that you can at least be aware of that. and dont beat yourself up, you obviously like this guy and wanted to see what it was like. it felt weird because it was the first time this happened to you. when you do feel ready then let him touch you again and with practice you'll be more comfortable and it will feel good (okay so ive never been fingered but i know about ohter stuff lol). but i think a big part of why you dont feel ready is because you look at it as "why would he want to". first of all hes touching it not licking it so its not that bad even with hair lol and he wants to pleasure you. thats why he wants to. but again dont feelpressured you dealt with it well and you guys ahve great communication. so you will eventually enjoy it or maybe it will be one of those thigns that you're like ughh naw my thing. dont stress it

[DarknHandsome]

make sure he knows its not his fault, let him know he didnt do anything wrong, its just you arent quite ready for that yet. No need to be embarrased about your body or anything like that.. just let him know WHY you say no, it helps. and if you dont like the hair, shave it off

[TheVindicator]

Hair=good in my opinion

Different topic though

 

It sounds like he's very respectful of you and your feelings. Your communication with him is good, keep it up! I'm not sure what you meant by feeling weird-physically or emotionally?