I need to know what this is, and what i should do about it..

[ztur]

Ok, so i have been seeing this girl who is great, amizing, awesome, inteligent, beautiful, you see where i am going... well, i have feelings for her obviously, but i am not sure if she has feelings for me. she says she "loves" me, but only calls me when she needs some. its like she is using me to satisfy her sexual needs. this has happened to me before, girls call me and tell me they need sex, but this girl is special. lately she has actually been wanting to hang out, calling me and wanting to spend time together. its nice being able to just talk to her. i know that sounds kinda gay, but i have been sexually active since i was 12(first time i had sex with a girl). i really don't know what to do, and i feel really imasculated with putting my probs on the web. help please. thanks

[melrich]

It's hard to see what your problem is. You really like this girl, she's awesome, the relationship started more as a sexual thing, she tells you she loves you and lately is calling you to see if you'll hang out with her more?

 

What is it that I am missing?

[ztur]

i want to be with her, but am not sure if she is just in it for the sex

[melrich]

Oh right. Well I guess you have to start hanging out with her more doing other things besides having sex. Or otherwise ask her straight up what she wants out of the relationship.

[ztur]

i have asked her before what she wants and it always seems like a new answer. it seems like she doesn't know what she wants. last time i asked it was ''a serious relationship'' but she didn't say ''with you'' which hurt. every time she says something like that it hurts because i have such strong feelings for her. also, we haven't had sex the last three times we hung out.

[melrich]

OK well then I think you have to tell her what you want and see how she reacts. maybe she is holding back saying how she feels because you are not telling her how you feel?

[ztur]

good idea, i didn't even think of that. but isn't it obvious how i feel. i mean i have sent flowers to her work for gods sake. isn't that enought? or do i just need to say it? i swear, if i wasn't so young, i would really consider asking her to marry me.

[melrich]

You need to say how you feel. Sure all you actions may point the right way but some people are never sure until they hear it.

[confusedgrl23]

sometimes we girls have sex with our bfs everytime we hang out because we THINK that YOU want it. Just make a comment about it to her, say something in a joking matter like "you just want me for sex dont you and see what she says. She might say though "ooooyes I do" because she might think that that is what YOU want her to say.

 

Its a weird thing between girls and guys. Why dont you spend time with her outside and public places more, places where you cant really do much except just talk.

 

You like her, she likes you....and you are complaining that she wants to have sex with you too much, what the heck is going on here?

[perfectliljewel]

im only 13 so u can either take me seriously or not i really dont care im just the little messenger trying to help. anyway i think you should talk about what YOU want. sometimes girls just need to hear it...... me i need actions to back up words(actions speck louder than words) try talking to her about wat u want... maybe she is just a bit uncomfortable to say wat she wants? i dont know i would have to hear yall talk and stuff so ya

 

good luck