Feeling guilty, what should I do?

[yume]

Recently one of my really close friend came back from college and she had plans to chill with her ex and his friends so I ended up going along with them. It's really fun when we all went out but one of his ex's close friend started liking me and is constantly calling. We chilled a couple of times so far, he always seemed so nice. He drives a really nice car, is willing to pick us up anytime anywhere we want and has been paying for everything. He told my friend that he really likes me but I don't think I'll be interested in dating him. I haven't rejected him and am just trying to avoid bringing up this topic when we are together. I'm afraid that if I tell him off he's going to think that I have been using him even though I'm trying to keep a distance and have been somewhat paying for myself. He told me he likes me the last time we were together but I pretended to not hear him and he's probably going to mention it again the next time I see him. I do like to go out with him as a group and he's a really koo friend but I don't want to tell him off. What should I say or do to maintain just that friendship and not make him hate me?

[charmed]

Hi Yume,

 

You should see my post ! I'm in a situation a bit similar to the guy you describe.

 

So heres one guys perspective.

 

He would seem to be not sure about your feelings. By telling your friend about it, he was taking the back route into telling you. For you to just hope that the situation blows over might be a little wishful !! I think you are either going to have to a) Tell him that you are not interested of b) Send off some serious body language to tell him. I did read somewhere that females have become extremely frustrated with the males lack of ability to pick up on even the most obvious of body language so perhaps the direct route back may be your best option.

 

I guess you want the guy as a friend - but I wouldn't quite put it like that to him - I know that I would probably cry for a week

[Alien777]

Hi Yume

I think you should be honest right from the start. Its pretty obvious that he likes you but unfornately you dont feel the same way. I have been in the same position that he is in and if only those ladies that I liked could have honest up front with instead of leading me on. I dont think he will hate u if u tell him truly how you feel, but if you dont say anything, eventually he is going to find out one way or another and that will probably hurt a bit.

So my advice is if you care about his feelings you will tell him that you like him as a friend and nothing more and not feel guilty about it. After all you have no control over how you feel about him and vice-versa, so there is no reason to feel guilty...

0X

[kandi13]

Hey ok just be honest with him, just tell him you really like him, but see him only as a good friend. And That you just wanna be friends with him....say friendship last longer with you, and thats all u want from him....