Is this the best way to get her back? What do you think?

[frigginexes]

Hi everyone, been awhile - here goes.

I am wondering what the best way to get an ex to reconsider dating you is?

 

quick background - broke up mutually a year ago because I needed to work on some things. She then dated around, I wanted to get over her first before I started dating. Were very close after broken up until I wanted NC 3 months ago to heal because she wouldn't go back with me. She didn't like the fact I implimented NC on her, but she abided.

 

She called some time ago for a dumb reason, and was trying to pry in my personal life, she wasn't even that friendly. She has a boyfriend now, she was seeing this guy when we were friends before the NC started, but she never called him her boyfriend until now, and even told me he was annoying before (who knows).

 

While on the phone I told her about my up and coming career and that I was happy and now have a girlfriend, all of which is true. It's weird I even go out now which when we were together, she said I was a homebody. I am like almost complete opposite of what I used to be, and I know she knows it.

 

I haven't rang her back, since she called last week to return my blanket, which ultimately seemed to be a "wonder who he's dating" reason for calling. She even mentioned her boyfriend (how nice).

 

I have been acting like I don't care about her, is this wrong? I don't call her unless she calls. She knows I'm doing good and am dating and going out. Should I keep acting this way to get her to want me back?

 

Thanks

[smushy]

my question to you is why do you want her back?

you mentioned that you have a girlfriend - does she know that you are playing some sort of manipulation to get your ex back?

honestly, it sounds like you are doing very well and have gotten yourself to a good place: happy with new gf, with career, going out, etc....

maybe it's time to let the past go and move on whole heartedly with your future...

good luck

[loveydovey]

That was what I was about to say. What about your girlfriend?....your present girlfriend. Now, its fine and dandy that you have feelings for your ex-girlfriend and you feel like you want to give it another go, but right now that CANNOT be your main focus. You need to realize that there are other people's feelings now involved in the mix. You have to consider that as well before you start trying to figure out if you're on the right road to winning her back or making her want you again. This is just my opinion, though.

[frigginexes]

so what if I didn't have a girlfriend or just dating someone, do you still think I'm doing the right thing?

[smushy]

from your brief "recap" of your history i can't tell why you would want her back... it seems like you have been doing better without her, then with.... don't confuse wanting her back with her little efforts to get your attention.

besides, what makes you think you can "get" her back? you have a gf, she has a bf.... plus, you're looking for the "rules of a game" to get her back... ultimately, you can't - if she wants to come back she will. honesty is very important, and unless one of you actually says that you want to try again, becareful not to read into something...