HELP!!!! am I obsessed or is this normal????!!!!

[reborn]

Hi Everyone,

I really need the replies of you people out there. I don´t know if I am going crazy or if this is normal. My boyfriend broke up with me around 3 months ago. We saw each other last 2 weeks ago. If you want to know the background read my posting "How not to get an ex back?" I guess you can find through my profile or in the relationships forum.

So, this is my situation. I just CANNOT STOP THINKING ABOUT MY EX, MORNING, AFTERNOON AND NIGHT. I just miss him so much and I can´t let go. I think of him when I fall sleep, when I wake up, when eat. I almost breakdown in tears everytime I am walking by my self in the streets. I dream of him, of his coldness. I miss him a lot. I try to distract my self. Today I was at a business meeting. I was all smiles and seemenly quite centered and professional but in my head I thought of him and how I miss him. Eveytime I see a sign on the street, a color, anything that vagely resembles something I enjoyed we did in the past I think of him. I call out his name when I am alone in my bed, or when I am walking by my self. Is this normal? Am I crazy?

 

It has been 3 months almost since we broke up. Please do read my post, because there was an attempt at reconciliation, but he backed out when I started talking relationship.This really messed me up and makes me think he may still love me or is confused though now he says he doesn´t and though is very physically attracted to me he feels unconfortable being close to me cause he thinks he may hurt me. He says I want a relationship and he doesn´t. And that he loves me as a family (this one day after we made love). So yes, he preety much told that though he is physically attracted to me, enjoys hanging out with me lots, laughs with no one as much as with me, thinks I am the most femine woman he has ever met, etc. he loves me as a family, is not in love with me. I wasn´t always in this state since the breakup. Maybe because he is leaving town in 2 weeks to live 3 hours away. I think in my mind ideas of how to hang out with him. I want to tell him, he is right about everything and that i miss him as a friend, and that he is leaving and that we should hang out. But, then I think of him telling he loves me as a family and I back out, also the fact that he has chosen not to contact me cause he thinks I still want a relationship with him while he is not ready for one now. But it hurts. If I take the relationship pressure away he might to hang out cause he just can´t deal with preassure, but then I think I will be humiliating my self. What do you think guys? Please answer me on this humiliation issue. I so need your imput because I might do something about this soon.

 

I try to reason with my self that there are other guys out there, that nobody is better than anyone esle so that I shouldn´t be all miserable just because of him. He said he is not in love with me anymore, so WHY THE HECK DO I STILL MISS HIM SO MUCH?????!!!! WHY THE HECK CAN´T I STOP THINKING OF HIM? I am crazy? Is this normal? Does this mean I am obsessed? Does this mean I need closure???? Has this ever happened to anyone of you guys? How long does this last.??? Help!!!!!!

[dviewed]

Wow! Reading what you are going through makes me realize 2 things:

1. Others have goofy (& painful) break ups, too.

2. Yes, we are both obsessed! (But when you feel like you've lost the love of your life I think a little obsession is to be expected)

I'm sorry you are going through this. I know how you feel and I know how painful it is to go through each day with the knot in your stomach. I've lost weight, can't sleep, break down at work (told my co-workers I have allergies), and generally am a mess over this guy who just isn't worth all this!

I've been trying to read everything I can on "moving forward" and some of it helps. Still, I have my weak moments...like last night (See "I fell of the wagon last night" for details)

Bottom line is this: These guys don't have the guts to tell us it's over, so they give us tiny crumbs of affection, which just keep us hanging on.

We should be strong & say "enough...I don't want you anymore if you don't want me!"

Here's hoping we both find the strength soon to just let these bozos go & find someone who appreciates the great women we are!

[Jitrenda]

It's okay! Relax...what you are feelin is perfectly normal. I broke up with my ex (i broke up with my ex) almost 4 months ago and i still think about him...it drives me crazy...but it doesn't bother me...it's part of the healing process.

 

You will find someone else no worries and you will get over him. Everything takes time and unfortunately...sometimes it takes a really really long time.

 

I wouldn't think about getting back together with him...he is not getting back with you i bet.

 

make a list of what you hate about him, write poems, keep busy with friends, family, hobbies and work.

 

I would really like to chat with you so please add me to any of the lists you use.

 

Take care and take it easy!

[kandi13]

OMG!!! I am so happy I read your post!!! I am in the same situation and didnt think anyone acted like i did. I met this gut a year and a half ago. I was totally obsessed with him. He was all i thought about day night afternoon. Even when I slept I dreamed about him. I thought no one felt the same. we went out 3 times b4. Well he ended up moving an hour away. I was so devistated. I mean so devistated, I cried I couldnt eat or sleep. He moved like 8 months ago I guess it was. He was the only one I talked about and I gave up my life for him, just to see him leave. Long story. I guess you can say that im stupid. I had every thing anyone could wish for. He was mine, he would still be mine if I would have just treated him the way he should have been treated. I treated him bad why...I donno. Im only 14 the guy is 16. You may think im young and I dont know how it is but I really do. I prolly know as much as a 20 year old would. Well he isnt mine now, he did move, and he doesnt wanna be with me. IM not as obsessed as I use to cuz he did sum stuff to me, that at the time I thought I deserved all of it but in reality no one deserves what he gave me. But he also didnt deserve what i gave him, cuz he treated me like his lil princess. So be happy you 2 r friends I just lost him yesterday but na in reality I lost him a year and a half ago. I still luv him to death and I miss and crave for him. I miss cuddling with him and I miss kissing him. And somedays I just call his name out when im alone. U r not alone!!!! Trust me and if you need to talk feel free. IT took me a year and sum to get ova him a lil so time will only tell!! Ya know. well thanks 4 listening