He didn't want me, but didn't want me to leave?

[Batya33]

10 hours ago, lavender2023 said:

I found interaction on the internet relaxing because I don't see people, not being in others' presence. I know it's a defect I must overcome.

Yes, because dating is in person.  Interacting with people in person can be intense or stressful especially when first meeting - hiding behind a screen is not dating and it's not helping your social skills for dating. It's also very unsafe potentially if you start making any assumptions about knowing this person for purposes of dating.   I get that it's hard -practicing as Andrina suggested will help.  Men who want to date you will not want to spend much time typing before meeting.  Men who have something to hide or aren't interested in dating and just like the easy breezy flirty texting won't be keen to meet. 

[Luxurygirl1207]

Hi, I don’t mean to come off mean or anything, but are you on the spectrum? Or do you suffer from any type of anxieties? Because not wanting to be recognized by people and shy of talking to men is kinda contradictory to wanting a relationship. Do you know when a man likes you or not? Why had nobody talked to you about men or dating by now? Far as older men, please stay away from them. You have to be well experienced as a young woman to deal with one. I was lied to as well about age (he said he was 38 but was 42) and the lies just never stopped. They only got worse. I didn’t know any better at 22. Now I’m 26 and I get it somewhat. I was shy of boys until 8th grade. I forced myself to interact with them, because I really had no reasons to be that damn timid lol. But if you want an actual adult relationship and possibly kids, I advise you really look into some therapy and do some self work. Watch some self improvement YouTube podcast like Real talk with Yannie and Tony Gaskins. They helped me a lot with introspection far as woman hood and men (both good and bad intentioned). Your mother not wanting to discuss relationships would be very off putting to me.

[lavender2023]

This update is for women facing similar situations and searching online for information. Yesterday, this guy somehow found my Twitter account, and he followed me and liked my tweets. I clicked on his profile and saw he posted screenshots that he talked to other girls. I thought he was trying to get me jealous, so I blocked him immediately. "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."

For me, blocking toxic people is the quickest way to recover, grow, and move on. My healing began the moment I blocked him everywhere. I started listening to Dr. John Gray's video on learning to love myself and realized that if I had learned to love myself first, I wouldn't have gotten involved with this guy to begin with. But I don't regret it because I learned and grew so much from this failure. “What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.” & “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.”

Lastly, I want to thank everyone who helped and advised me here. I couldn't have done the blocking without your insights. I won't delete this post, so whoever is trapped in similar situations can find my experience and other people's wonderful and useful advice. Thank you! 

[MissCanuck]

3 hours ago, lavender2023 said:

But I don't regret it because I learned and grew so much from this failure.

What failure? 

Sure, you hung on to the idea of him too long but ultimately you recognized that he is not a good person to have in your life and there was no chance of a relationship with someone like him. 

Where is the fail, girl? 

[lavender2023]

45 minutes ago, MissCanuck said:

What failure? 

Sure, you hung on to the idea of him too long but ultimately you recognized that he is not a good person to have in your life and there was no chance of a relationship with someone like him. 

Where is the fail, girl? 

I should use the word 'mistake' instead, sorry, English is my second language. I had low self-esteem, so I believed in his excuses and suppressed my feelings for two months. 

[MissCanuck]

18 minutes ago, lavender2023 said:

 I had low self-esteem, so I believed in his excuses and suppressed my feelings for two months. 

Give yourself credit for now cutting this off. 

You can certainly learn from this experience, and above all, learn to love yourself more. 

 

[lavender2023]

18 minutes ago, MissCanuck said:

Give yourself credit for now cutting this off. 

You can certainly learn from this experience, and above all, learn to love yourself more. 

 

Thank you Miss Canuck for your kind comment and your help🥹!