How old is 15, really?

[DragonGirl724]

and i understand that this topic is sectioned off for the 15 yr olds...but what about the 12, 13, 14 year olds? a lot of you are saying that a 15 is able to make this decision on their own..(which makes me laugh) well whats wrong with a 14 yr old or a 13 yr old?? there isnt much of a difference in maturity. so basically its okay for people at any age to have sex...ok i understand now...

 

(touch of sarcasm there...)

 

-DG724

[mattj]

yeah the age of consent is 16 in the british isles, including where i live seeing as it is a peculiar of the british crown- you can also get married at that age but can't drive a car until 17 or 18 i can't remember which? i think someone has their priorities wrong there...

[mattj]

and yet they keep sex and marriage where it is? i mean correct me if i'm wroong but maybe the low ae gives out the wrong message? i mean sureley it should be given the same classification as alchohol- something that can be used for pleasure but can be misused, and can be dangerous for someone's health and social life.

 

and whoa bad luck there!

[igor512]

It's true that a lot of 15 year-olds aren't ready for sex, and they may or may not know this, but at the same time there are a lot of 21 year-olds that "shouldn't" be having kids either. There are 30 year-olds that "shouldn't" be having kids. The fact is, no matter what age you put it at, there will be people that can't handle the consequenses. The fact that it happens "more often" to teens is no reason to discount them from sexual activity, because it's an arbitrary cutoff no matter where you put it. There is no age where you become "mature" and there is no age where you can suddenly make informed decisions.

 

So basically, deregulate sexuality completely and let people act on their urges. We obviously can't stop the teens from humping each other all the time, so why not utilize modern technology to prevent pregnancies. If they can't handle it emotionally, there's nothing we can do about it. They have already made their decision, so the best we can do is eliminate as many consequences as possible.

[DragonGirl724]

igor,

 

the thing is you can not control a 21, or 30 yr old..a 15 year old you can, & they need to know dicipline, hardcore risk & need to grow up & finish highschool at least.

 

-DG724

[igor512]

Well obviously you can't control a teenager. If you could, we wouldn't be having this discussion. The ones that grew up with discipline and knowing risk aren't the ones that are out getting pregnant. Short of a moral revolution among parents, nothing is going to change that there are teenagers out there who don't get much parenting at home and never will. Those are the ones that don't make the good decisions. We've tried teaching them just not to have sex. In fact, that's what's been going on for the past 30-40 years. Since that obviously doesn't work, we're left with eliminating the consequenses, not removing the act.

[ShySoul]

Age isn't the issue, its the level of maturity. I would have no problem if a 15 had a great paying job and was able to support a family. Or if the person was fully able to handle the emotional consequences. But really, how many 15 year olds do you know that can do that? I certainly wasn't ready and everyone has always said how mature I've been for my age. No one I knew then was ready for that kind of responsibility.

 

Many adults still don't understand what having sex really is about or can handle the consequences.

 

Then theres a question of where do you draw the line. If 15 is ok, why not 14 or 13? How about 10? I think 18 makes since since it is when you are considered an adult, at least in the US. You graduate high school, you go to college or go to work. It's as good an age as any to hold people accountable. But people shouldn't be in such a rush to grow up. Enjoy having few responsilities. It goes by so quickly, why do we want to rush it only to look back and wish we had those days back? Sex brings so many issues to the table, issues most young people aren't ready for. Let that happen later, when you are truly ready. For know, enjoy what you have. Hey, kissing is pretty nice (so I hear). Savour that.

[7CardStud]

People will do what they want, whether u want them to or not...

 

It's like pot... People do it cuz they want to...

 

If it was legalized... People wouldn't do it, cuz they wouldn't want to...

 

It's just a thing of morals, and those, are extremely hard to change...

 

So, don't try to force anything on anyone, just be accepting and try to help them

 

(btw i don't smoke pot haha )

 

One other thing, This question is like, when do u considered someone bald? 1,000 hairs? 1,001 hairs? 2,000 hairs? There isn't a real answer, your bald or ur not...

[Hope75]

It's true that a lot of 15 year-olds aren't ready for sex, and they may or may not know this, but at the same time there are a lot of 21 year-olds that "shouldn't" be having kids either. There are 30 year-olds that "shouldn't" be having kids. The fact is, no matter what age you put it at, there will be people that can't handle the consequenses.

 

This is indeed true, but I think when we are discussing 15 year old teenagers we are talking about the majority or 15 year olds, versus a minority of 21 or 30 year olds. I don't think we are trying to make an arbitrary cut off date, but as a general rule, a 15 year old just isn't mature enough in any way to be taking on the responsibility of a sexual relationship.

 

At least in that respect, a 21 or 30 year old can hold a full time job, hopefully having completed at least high school and preferably secondary education to an extent, drive a car, vote, and have some life experience under thier belt in order to apply what they've learned toward an educated decision. And I can tell you from experience, that from 15 to 30 years old there is alot of growing and maturing and experiences that will shape a person and make them better able to handle what life throws at them.

[broken soul]

Well i am going to answer your question from experience. I am 16 and I 1st had sex when i was 15, so basically last year. And i do have to say that i regret it. Maybe there were certain factors that effected my decision... like being pressured into it i guess. Also he was my 1st boyfriend and we went out for about 1 year already... i definetly DIDNT want to loose him. I mean like you said, ive heard ppl going on and on and on about too young to have sex, don't get pressured into it, your not suppose to have sex until after your married and so on and so forth. But really when it comes down to it there are a ton of factors that could influence their decision regardless of how smart they really are. I mean when reflecting back on it all i think is.. how could i have done that? how could i have been so stupid? I think it just really depends on the individual. Some young people are smart enough not to, and if they really want to and are emmotionally mature enough to handle it then it is their decision. I mean ppl say wait until you are ready. But when exactly is that? Maybe there really isnt a "right" age, it all depends on the individual. And yes adults tell us these things because they don't want you to screw up and make mistakes.... but you have to make your own mistakes. Usually the best lessons are learned through personal experience.

[darkblue]

My opinions are very strong on this matter.

 

When I was fifteen, I had a very good friend, she was incredibly intelligent, but on a drunken night, she slept with her boyfriend.

 

She later thought she was pregnant, and through concern told me what happened. I was with her through it all. The pregnancy test, the negative result, everything. One thing she didn't know was, I was in love with her and it completely broke my heart.

 

I was so unbelievably heartbroken that I still live that pain today..I can feel it.

The pain of loving someone, then they make a mistake and you'll never look at them the same again, it's so painful.

 

This makes me feel strongly that not only should 15 year olds not be having sex, but they should be taught the concequences more firmly. Teen pregnancies are just a waste of a life..

[mattj]

i have to say that i have had simmilar experiences as the guy above

[Day_Walker]

The original intent of this thread was to determine if you feel that a 15 year old has the intellectual capacity to decide if they want to have sex. In my opinion yes they do, it is their choice to make if they want to have sex. As it is with anything else people do have the choice to do many things drugs, sex or even to kill a person. Now some of those choices are legal and some are not but never the less they still are a choice that we can and have the possibility of making. I wanted to get away from the social stigma of a 15 year old having sex and instead look at it from a perspective of them making a decision with the intellectual capacity they have gained up until that point. As with any other issue alternate answers have been given to support why 15 year olds shouldnt have sex but the point I want to get accross is do they have the intellectual capacity to make a decision of that magnitude?

[mattj]

when i look around me at people in my class at school i have to say the answer is definetley no.

[darkblue]

I echo that.

 

Plus we can not stereotype, there will be some fifteen year olds whom are perfectly capable of making their decision and living with the consequences, but there are some [in my opinion the majority] who are not ready to make that kind of decision.

[weatherbuff1]

I dont think any 15 year old is but the fact is its happening. One thing im amazed by is the difference between some 15 year olds. Look at this board, we have some posting about their first kiss and others about how to finger their Gf the right way..

[ShySoul]

If a 15 year old has the intellectual capacity to make that choice and do decide to use it, most likely they would choose to wait. They would consider all the consequences and realize that its such a big step that they are all but certainly not ready to handle what could happen. Of course, there is a slim chance some may be able to, but thats insanely rare. I still see people my age who shouldn't be doing the things they do. If someone that age isn't ready, then I can't see 15 year olds as ready.

 

Based just on intellectual capacity, the ones who have it aren't the ones likely too choose that path. It's the ones who don't fully think first that are more likely to go ahead with it.