Some guideance please...Im a little lost..

[urbangentleman]

Hi everyone,

 

this is my first post as i only joined today.I hope someone can lend me their thoughts to me.

 

I met this wonderful woman who is 26 , I'm 30, and have been dating her for 3 months.

She has said to me that i am so different from every other guy that she has dated, and as she has twin duaghters who are 7 and absolutely gorgous, it is a differnt kind of relationship i am used to as well.Initially i only met them a month ago, which i respect her reasons for.She is studying f/t at uni as well.

 

A week ago she told me that the relationship was over becuse she doesnt have time, is a bit commitment phobic, too independent, not sure that she's ready for a relationship,all going too fast, too soon after her last one, 8 months ago, and he was very nasty in the end.I offered to slow it down, but she still ended it.She said to me that she still wants to be friends and spend time with me as she really enjoys my company. I told her i was hurt, big mistake, and that i dont know if i could do that after being intimate with her.I do miss her and would like to try.

 

My Question is should i call her?...What do i say?....Does she really want to see me and be in contact with me, or is that the classic line.It's been a tough week , but i made it through, but am feeling in a bit of a mess.I would like to try with her again if thats what she wants. I wonder if she has missed me in the last 10days as have not made any contact? Do u think she may be thinking about me or waiting for me 2 call?

[Jetta]

My thoughts are the kids didn't like you or something, and she has decided to end it. So no don't contact her.

[Hope75]

You really have to think about what YOU want and what's best for you in this situation.

 

Do you think you can handle being just friends with her or will it be too hard and will you constantly be trying things to get her back?

 

She sounds like she had alot on her plate right now with full time uni and being a young single mom of twin girls, and plus she was badly burned in her last relationship.

 

If you feel like you can handle the just friends thing than go ahead and give her a call, but it sounds like you'd like her back as you still have feelings (understandable) but if that is the case you are only going to hurt yourself more by spending time with her and reminding yourself of what you can't have.

[urbangentleman]

My thoughts are the kids didn't like you or something, and she has decided to end it. So no don't contact her.

 

Thats the thing jeeta , she said that she is scared of the kids getting attatched if it doesnt work out.....we have so much fun together they call me the computer man

[Jetta]

Then Hope is probably onto something. She's afraid. So back off for a bit, give her the space she needs. I don't know if she will come around because I'm not her. But she's just not ready for whatever reason.