Jump to content

Unsure how this guy feels...Is he into me?

Recommended Posts

Hello all,


I am new to this site. I'm openly gay and have been out for years. I met a guy through my best friend's business last year, he's a friend of a client of ours and we got around to texting. He's straight and very interesting! I was interested in getting to know him so I invested a lot of time into a texting relationship because a friend introduced us and explained we had a lot in common but we had not met yet.


For a few months we would text every day all day, every morning, every night. He would say good morning or I would, he would say goodnight or I would. We would talk on the phone about a lot of things and it became a very close knit friendship between two guys. He helped me through some emotional distress and I him. I developed feelings for him, he was aware of it but he was interesting in dating a female friend of mine at the time. Eventually that fizzled and I kept asking him to give me a chance and go out on a date with me. I put a lot of effort into getting to know him and talking with him. It didn't seem normal for two guys our age and with me being gay, him straight to talk as often as we do unless we had been lifelong friends. That's my opinion anyway...


We finally met because he lives out of town and has a busy job. He came into town and we went out to dinner twice during his weekend visit. Everything went fine, we had a lot of laughs, the food was delicious. We walked out to the cars (he rented, I obviously had my own) and we kissed twice. He seemed shocked because he's never been with another guy before, has only strictly been in serious relationships with women. We parted ways with the premise that we would see how things go. When he arrived back at his hotel, he texted me saying he just wasn't sure what he wanted to do and isn't sure he could date a guy. We had a huge fight, I begged him to give me a chance, even while he was boarding a plane the next day we were arguing over the end result.


Eventually he agreed to come back and we would go out again. He came back to visit the following month, we spent a few evenings in his hotel room just laying on the bed kind of cuddling and watching movies. We would kiss and we ordered food in. We decided to go out his last night visiting and we had a great time. It seemed like things were going very well because afterwards there was no discussion on stopping. We would talk all of the time, text, and it became somewhat interesting because we say we love each other but he would say he genuinely cares about me. I would ask him for another date and he said "sure". He was unable to come visit me so I went to visit him. He showed me all around his hometown, we did so many fun things, went out to dinner, laid in my hotel room and watched a movie. Again, we would spend time kissing and really connect. Everything went so well, we agreed to see each other again the following month. I flew to see him again, we spent a weekend at a friends house and slept in the same bed together. Again, there was no talk of us not dating, we were still seeing each other.


This has been going on for a year now. We aren't "official" but we aren't seeing other people. We are still seeing each other, we visit each other and spend time kissing, cuddling, touching, but he says he is still afraid of sex but is really putting an effort into our situation. We even went away on a trip together. We were alone, slept together for days, held hands and kissed in public. I just don't believe I am naive in thinking that he feels something. I feel like he must be interested or we would have ended a year ago. There would be nothing. We have spent the past year visiting each other, we have met families, we have gone away together, we have slept in the same bed, and we continue to go out and discuss that we are dating each other and continuing to see how it goes.


Am I wrong? I want to make sure I am not crazy! :)

Link to comment

What kinds of discussions have you had about it all? Is he interested in advances the relationship with you? Have you actually discussed exclusivity or have you just assumed? Have you had sex or is it strictly kissing and cuddling? If things progress would either of you be willing to relocate so that you're not in a perpetual long distance with one another?

Link to comment

We discuss that we enjoy our time together, that we are both interested in continuing to see where it goes. He says he is working towards getting there sexually but is nervous as he has never done it before. He does tell me that he knows I'd be a great partner. We both agreed together not see others because it would complicate things we both don't want to complicate it. I feel like I'm not crazy and there's something there but wanted to hear others thoughts. And we both know one of us would have to move and make the change which is okay by me.

Link to comment
We discuss that we enjoy our time together, that we are both interested in continuing to see where it goes. He says he is working towards getting there sexually but is nervous as he has never done it before.
Then you have your answer. What else are you looking to hear, he's pretty much laid it all down quite clearly?


I guess you're dating and its akin to a hetro guy dating a virgin. You just have to be patient and wait until he's ready.

Link to comment

I guess I just want to make sure I'm not getting myself into something too deep, hoping too much just to get shut down. It's been a year of it and of course we only get to visit about once a month so it complicates progression because it'd be easier if we lived near each other. But I'm afraid because I definitely feel love and am extremely hopeful.

Link to comment


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...