How should I ask soemone if theyre bi/gay and ask them out?

[bmv777]

Well I have two friiends I think might be bi/gay and they are my best friends . I really like them both and I really want to ask one of them if therye bi/gay. If they say no I fear theyre goign to tell the whole school im bi/gay and I know that may not sound bad because I am but the people in my school would treat my differently and some would try and beat me up.

 

If they are bi/gay I really think I could have a great relationship but if they arent than im going to lose friendship with them I fear. Please help me with this.

[Cadence308]

We get this question about once a week on the forum. The best way to address this isn't just to come out and ask your friend, "Hey, dude, are you bi?" LOL

 

You need to play it safe. There's many ways to do this. If you are watching TV and something on the news and gay marriage comes up on the news or on a TV show that would be a good way to start a conversation wtih your friend by saying, "Have you ever kissed another guy? Do you know anyone who is gay?" Just see how your friends react. If they are like, "No, that's disgusting. I would never do that. I would never be friends with someone like that." Then you know your answer or can be pretty sure that they are homophobes. However, if they are more open to it and even admit to having gay friends then you can probe more deeply by asking, "Have you ever wanted to kiss another guy? Have you been attracted to another guy before?"

 

Chances are, if your friends react positively about knowing someone who is gay or can empathize with homosexuals, then it's a safer situation to ask more questions. Just don't out yourself until you know it's safe.

 

Good luck finding out!

[Catatonika]

Thank you. Seventeen and in the same predicament lol.