Still Need Help

[K]

Me again, same problem.. if you remember. I really like perhaps love a guy who is like 6 years younger than me. But he's been giving serious vibes to my sister who is a year older than him. Sometimes he looks into my eyes and I swear I see something, its like he really touches me. Honestly, I've been getting quite jealous because he and my sister were as usual sitting together, laughing, and whispering and I couldn't help feeling jealous. I think I kept it under wraps but was a bit standoffish to him. He went all quiet. But when we tease him for my sister he's like "Like I'd do that for her" or whatever. He gave her a back rub the other night after I'd paid for one that afternoon and she was like "You sucker, Ï got one for 45 mins for free" I didn't know what to say but he looked quite ashamed. And then last night he like sat on my lap and wanted to play fight a little. He always like values my opinion and listens when I speak, but I wonder if I'm just like the big sister to the girl he likes. Theres this other male friend of mine who is always the real gentleman to me so I'm extra nice to him. And we were standing kind of close to each other and looking at something and he came in and stood right between us and like a kind of smile came to his face, I thought that was cute. And once we were at the movies and he said before he left he said "If I come back and an asian guy (I love asian men - very sexy) is sitting in my seat, I'll be very annoyed!", and I was like "Where did that come from"? So when he and my sis are doin their flirting thing I hate it! I keep remembering this one time when he like looked bowled over by this dress my sister was wearing, and said twice to me "**** looks really nice tonight", back then it didn't bother me but now it plagues me. But then when he first saw a shorter haircut I had once, he looked the same way?" Another thing, whenever he's around my sister is always really nasty about putting me down really quickly, I talk to her about it later and she belittles me and blows it off. If there was any truth in what she was saying I wouldn't mind but she says I do stuff I just don't do. Can someone please tell me how to lock all this away from my mind. My sisters happiness is very important to me, I don't want to make a move on him at all. I truly believe that I can find another, but am really caught in all this, I'm going crazy, how can I tell if it me or her?..without asking? And ultimately turn this off - has anyone else been in this situation and successfully overcome their feelings?

[robbdaman]

So he hits on, flirts with and hangs out with both of you. Age is irrelevant when it comes to that. The thing is he is playing you both which considering you are sisters isn't cool. He doesn't want to choose so simply put you're going to have to especially since your sister doesn't think much of it.

 

My advice is find the company of a guy who wants just you.

[K]

Yes I was thinking that last night, perhaps he see's different things he likes in both of us. We grew up together, so I think he's not sure what he's doing to me. I really don't think he has an idea I'm feeling this way. Everyone just assumes he'll be with my sis coz they get along well and are about the same age. I was thinking coz he's so young perhaps he's playing with his sexuality, or appeal - if you know what I mean? The point is - I gotta stop letting him get to me.

But I must ask, what do you mean by "especially since your sister doesn't think much of it"?, please explain.

[cookies]

i think what he means is that your sis dont seem to be bothered by it...and they seem to be a bit closer than the two of u are..and personally, i agree...i htink hes playing both of u...if u let him. Theres no way that i could hook up with a guy thats diggin my sister..and he IS diggin ur sister...sorry to break it down like that...but its the truth.

 

ugh...i couldnt even bother with a guy like this...find sumbody that wants you, and have no interest in flirting with ur sis, and giving her a backrub, and u having to go off and pay 4 one..that enought 4 me to say...ok...hes NOT 4 me...

 

cookies

[K]

 

 

Last night I thought I'd ask his friend if he thought he liked my sister. And he told me: "He's already asked your sister out but she didn't seem interested". Well it was like a stab to the heart. But the more I think about it the more I think that she really didn't know what he was asking. On the other hand perhaps she's known all along and didn't tell me, no I really don't think she'd keep it from me.

So then I got to thinking that all this time when I thought we were digging each other he was probably only doing it to make her jealous. And by her cutting remarks she's showing its been working.

So the next time he attempts to sit on my lap I'm going to rip into him and say something like "Excuse me, I'm not a toy to be played with, you want to flirt go and find ***"or something like that. Now I just have the task of purging all my feelings for him and not being too snappy when he's around. The punk! I hate the thought that I'm going to feel like an idiot at their wedding, coz she's already told me she wants me to be her bridesmaid! But I'm pretty sure no one knows whats going through my head, except you's and me. I had a restless sleep with all this going through my head, and have the heart pain that comes with being hurt. I'm such an idiot

[cookies]

naaa...ur not an idiot..ur just learning how idiotic SOME guys can be...but not all are this way tho. This is the type of guy that has the mentality of "keeping it in the famly" that you would see on Jerry Springer show...screwing 2 sisters, and breaking up their close family relations.

 

Knowing taht he outright flirts with you, and having asked ur sis out, behind ur back...goes to show you that he is a snake in the grass, and u better not turn your back on him..

 

Get away from this joker as slowly, yet quickly as u can so that you dont wind up hurt, or fallling prey to any of his "sweet talk", and get u in the sack just where he wants u,..and prolly know he can get u...if given the chance. YOu got the knowledge u need by talkin to ppl a bout it..so now its up to u to handle your business with that zero.

 

hopefully ur sis will see things tooo...but even if she doesnt, just YOU dont let him come between u. Blood is always thicker...cookies