can it happen again

[wonderland88]

I am only 16 years old but I know what true love is...

 

I have done everything with this exboyfriend and I feel completely lost without him...is there any advice for me???

 

It had been a month since our break up and I blame myself for everything...I can't concentrate in school or at work and I don't feel like doing anything anymore except mope and feel depressed..

 

He seems to be kinda happy these days because he's always with friends (we have the same friends and it feels awkward to be around them) but all the clothes and special things I've bought for him he's wearing all the time.

 

I tried talking to him and working things out but he says, "I don't know if we'll ever get back together and I don't want you waiting for me" I don't know how to react to that because he means everything to me.

 

Our relationship started to have a downfall because I was stressed out about school work and family issues...and I vented on him because he was the only person there for me and I regret it all the time...I was acting kinda extra mean lately and things just got worse and we ended it...it's now been the biggest mistake of my life.

 

I just can't seem to move on because I spend so much time crying and wishing I could change things...he always treated me well..walked me to class, walked me to work etc.

 

Now he's talking to this exgirlfriend that lives a couple hours away from him and I get so upset just hearing her name...my friend talked to him and he said that nothing was going on between him and this other girl...

 

I just don't know what else to do because I've talked to him and wanted to work things out but he just throws everything in my face making me more upset...I've hurt him and he's hurting me...

 

Does anyone have any advice for me to try and save our relationship because this guy means the world to me and I really really need help...

[brando]

im sorry for the pain you feel, but you r so young, and there will be more boyfriends to come. Enjoy your life, sixteen comes but once, and those are great years to live and have fun. If he is acting happy, act happy as well. When you feel down and sad, try not to show him, it will only inflate his ego. Their are more fish in the sea, and you have all the time in the world to go fishing...

 

be well,

 

Brando

[Hope75]

Hi Hon,

 

welcome to enotalone!

 

First take a deep breath.

 

OK, This probably isn't what you want to hear but I don't think you should be sitting around over analyzing this or trying to figure out to get your ex back. From what you've said he doesn't seem to be interested in getting back with you, he's happy now and I think by hanging on to this you are sabotaging your ability to move on and heal from the breakup.

 

You are young, and first love doesn't usually end up being forever. Not that is can't ever happen, but it's very rare. You are going to meet alot of different guys in your life and I am willing to bet that you will fall in love again, and in a few years your ex will be nothing but a vague memory.

 

I first fell in love at 15, was with the guy for a year and when we split at age 16, I thought the world was over. I barely can picture his face now.

 

This doesn't lesson your pain, I know. This is going to hurt for a little while, and it's OK to let it, just don't let it take over your life. Get out there, keep busy with school and your friends, exercise, do things you love to do.

 

Don't waste another minute on the guy who is happy now without you and talking to a different ex.

 

You are better then that, and you deserve more and you will find it, just give yourself time.

 

Good luck!

[goddess23]

take it from someone your age whos recently been there. let me tell you something. even if there is hope for you two getting back together you need to set your mind to the train of thought that its over. because right now hes happy. and you need to accept that. you may still lvoe him, like him and that may never change. but you need to move on. there is a difference between loving someone and moving on. you need to move on. you need to get on wit hyou life and the first step as ironic as it sounds is to lose hope. TRUST ME PLZZ JUST TRUST ME ON THIS ONE. and once you start to pretend that you dont care, soon it will become a reality and thats what you need to show your ex. that you're happy too. because you pestering him about the future is going to piss him off and push him further away. just dont do it. and its not easy but time will heal all wounds. it will.

[RayKay]

One of the cruel things about adolescence is our hormones are running so high, and we are often only able to focus on them - when we are not so prepared for all the stresses that can come along.

 

I am with the other posters and really don't think you should sit around analyzing this anymore.

 

I promise you that there will be other loves in your life, and yes even more heartbreak. But ultimately, you will also find someone who will light up your life, and you will light up his. It's probably quite a long way off yet, as you still have years of maturing, growing and experience to go through first before your paths cross (and yes, those darn heartbreaks!) but it is all part of that path preparing you. Everything happens for a reason and one day you will even learn from this past relationship, as you have already learned some valuable lessons I am sure and formed more of who you are as well.

 

Trust in the healing powers of time, involve yourself in other passions of yours, surround yourself with friends, and enjoy your youth...there is so much time before you meet that great lifelong love, and when you do you will hardly ever even remember this guy. I am not devaluing what you had, just telling you you do have so much growing to do and from experience it does all work out in the end for the best

[wonderland88]

Thank you everyone for your support

 

I am starting to get on the recovery train I guess you could say, trying to work on my grades and everything else but it's still hard

 

My friends who also talk to him say that he isn't happy and he wants to be single for a while...he's just confusing...lol are all guys like this???

 

It's hard not to still have hope for the future and I still like the thought of getting back together because what we had for the majority of the time was perfect...

 

I'm loved by his family and they want us to get back together as well...I just want him to realize what I realize and that's that we should give it another shot

 

He always told me that I meant everything to him and he couldn't picture life without me...so why doesn't he want to work things out???