So confused, help!

[DanielleL123]

I'm completely confused about everything. Basically, I will start from the beginning. I am with a guy seven years, with him since I was 16 years of age I am now 23. I was always crazy about him and always saw myself spending the rest of my life with him. When I was about 19 and started to go out more, I began to question if he and I were right for each other, I thought.. wow I love him but I'm so young what do I really know? But every time I saw him all my doubts melted away. I just loved him so much. I'd say in the past year we've been a bit too comfortable with each other. He stays over a lot and a lot of things he does irritates me, even if he's doing nothing wrong! I want to go back to the way we were but I don't know how. And now I feel even worse because I recently started a new job and I met this guy who I now have feelings for, I have never ever had feelings for anyone other than my partner in 7 years and I'm so confused. I've only ever felt this way about him, now I'm feeling really strong feelings for this guy. This other guy probably doesn't even like me back and I would never break up with my partner for someone or cheat on him, but I found myself lying on nights out with my colleagues saying we were on a break and trying to gauge his reaction to see if he cared, I didn't even feel bad! Until afterwords. I never did anything but I've began to think that's just because the guy didn't do anything. I can't believe I've become like this I've always thought of myself as a loyal girl. Me and this guy in work spend every lunchtime together in the cafeteria or we go for a walk together. Sometimes I feel like he likes me and other times I feel like he just thinks of me as a great friend, I found out he's seeing a girl, which made me really sad, but he won't tell me about it or talk to me about her even though he talks to me about everything else! if he messages me my heart skips a beat! I don't know what to do. Sometimes I think it'd be easier to just be on my own completely because I'm so confused and full of fear and doubt and I just don't know what the right thing to do is. My partner is an awesome guy, we just haven't been getting along but do I give up 7 years after a few months of bumpiness? I don't know what to do, any advice would be greatly appreciated

[SadSadgirl]

to me it sounds like you're detaching from your current partner and are becoming emotionally invested into this new guy, which is still cheating in a way

[DanielleL123]

I get what you mean. But I'm so confused I need advice!

[SadSadgirl]

you should try telling your partner you're feeling distant lately (don't mention the other guy). try to talk out your differences. the 7 year period is a milestone which can cause confusion and it seems like you're there. you've been tied down for a veery long time so maybe you should consider being young and single.

[Thecheesecake1]

Honestly? I don't think it's the new guy you should be concerned about. It's the current boyfriend...I was also with someone for a long time who i planned to marry etc and out of nowhere i began to like someone who joined our college...But what i found is that it wasn't this new guy, it was things id never seen in the old guy..Sounds harsh but he also found someone else who had things i didn't have...It hurt like hell for both of us but after a year i think we did the best thing...

 

However if it is just attraction you may just be feeling stale .

Do not feel guilty , if you get a gut feeling more than once a day that youre not happy with your current bf then end it , It was eating me up and you will break him harder the longer ya leave it