constantly worried

[blacklab12]

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year, he's graduated and i'm still studying. Up till now we have had a very good relationship however, just after Christmas we had some problems and went on a break. It didn't last very long but in the interim period he said some things such as 'he didn't see me in his future'. Since then, we have spoken and he has told me he loves me and doesn't want to be without me. However, when ever i talk about the future, he now doesn't like speaking about it. I know i can be quite forceful and he says it just irritates him as he isn't very good at talking about feelings (which he isn't), but I just worry that he doesn't see me in his future. He has now told me he does and that he wants to fix things as he loves me... I'm just worried I bring things up again and annoy him by constantly needing reassurance as I am very insecure. How do I stop this constant pestering him about his feelings?

[Dahl]

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year, he's graduated and i'm still studying. Up till now we have had a very good relationship however, just after Christmas we had some problems and went on a break. It didn't last very long but in the interim period he said some things such as 'he didn't see me in his future'. Since then, we have spoken and he has told me he loves me and doesn't want to be without me. However, when ever i talk about the future, he now doesn't like speaking about it. I know i can be quite forceful and he says it just irritates him as he isn't very good at talking about feelings (which he isn't), but I just worry that he doesn't see me in his future. He has now told me he does and that he wants to fix things as he loves me... I'm just worried I bring things up again and annoy him by constantly needing reassurance as I am very insecure. How do I stop this constant pestering him about his feelings?

 

Have you long been so anxious / worried?

 

I would recommend that you focus your attention on how you feel about this, as opposed to what you might do about it.

 

Accepting that something is out of your control and that, despite this undeniable fact, even because of it, you're going to be okay, not because you'll be able to intervene and control or prevent it, but because whatever happens, you have confidence in yourself to manage, survive and thrive regardless, is a long and hard-earned talent, but it's the best way.

 

It may be the only way, when you come right down to it.

 

Good luck.

[Wiseman2]

It's too soon to pressure about the future. Just relax and see if you even want him in yours rather than chasing weddings.

 

Do you think he's telling you what you want to hear now to string you along?

he said some things such as 'he didn't see me in his future'.

He has now told me he does and that he wants to fix things as he loves me

[kamurj]

Multiple accounts are not allowed. Thread closed.