Vernix23 Posted December 7, 2016 Share Posted December 7, 2016 2 days ago me and my girlfriend just broke up...she told me she doesn't love me 100% anymore...she told me i meant a lot to her and she waited for long for me to change.....i loved her with all my heart i changed a lot of things about me for her...i changed 90% percent for her and never asked anything in return...i know i am not perfect thats why i tried to be...and sometimes it takes time to change...i tried to make her feel special i gave her so much to the point that i almost didn't have time for myself anymore...when we fought i felt like i was not allowed to say my opinions because if i do she will attack me automatically...i gave up then and told myself..fine...ill just say sorry even though it wasn't my fault...thats the summary of it but what confuses me....or maybe im just blind...is at the end she was crying she said she was sorry...but then i met her yesterday by accident and saw her talking with a guy on the phone very happy and all that...i went up to say hi out of respect and asked her hey who was that? it was a guy in her work..then she started telling me i got over it between us yeah we broke up but that doesn't mean i can't be with someone else...it has not even been 3 days after the breakup what confuses me now is....was she lying the whole time did she even love me at all? did she use me?....i am so confused.....was i even any worth to her....? Link to comment
justshine1 Posted December 7, 2016 Share Posted December 7, 2016 How long were you dating? Perhaps she may have been using you I guess...depends. but ppl are more cruEl these days as I'm learning myself. What I have to say about all this is....if she started dating you she must have liked every bit about you. Why would you even need to change who you are at all? I understand in a relationship maybe someone does things the other doesn't like..hense working on their own to change the way they do or handle something. But for you to change 90 % who you are for someone is extreme to me. Just be you! Link to comment
Vernix23 Posted December 7, 2016 Author Share Posted December 7, 2016 we have been dating for 1 year and 5 months...i had a couple of relationships before....but she...was the very first girl i loved so much...at first it wasn't like that but as the time went by i fell in love more and more and more...to the point where i was serious..at the 5 month mark i decided i want to do everything for her..im ready...and i guess i was an idiot for doing that...i actually never gave this much to someone before...and cause of that..im so hurt right now....i guess i was totally blind... Link to comment
Edmund Exley Posted December 7, 2016 Share Posted December 7, 2016 Which things about you did you change? We're they things that needed to be changed, or things she wanted changed? Usually, when someone wants you to "change" nothing you do is ever going to be enough. And this one sounds like a self absorbed control freak. Link to comment
Vernix23 Posted December 7, 2016 Author Share Posted December 7, 2016 i guess you are right...well i guess this isn't what you can call "change" but there was one situation where i went to meet up with friends of mine and she was there with me cause i wanted them to get to know my ex...and out of friendly gesture my friend that is a girl hugged me and said hi hows it going?...after the meet up she got really mad at me and told me why did she hug you?!? she told me i should take distance from that girl she might like me and all that...she said one time that i was too nice to girls...that i help girls often...even though i help almost anyone...she told me to become more stricter towards girls that i should if possible "hang out" lesser with my other friends that are girls... Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted December 7, 2016 Share Posted December 7, 2016 When someone insists on this much "change" you will be jumping through their hoops forever. Dating is a what you see is what you get situation. If she was chronically complaining about you, that's a giant red flag. Date girls who accept you and appreciate you as you are and are compatible, not some drill sergeant. It sounds like you dodged a bullet.she told me she doesn't love me 100% anymore... she waited for long for me to change....i changed 90% percent for her Link to comment
SooSad33 Posted December 7, 2016 Share Posted December 7, 2016 You changed and changed and changed more.. for her. ... and yet, she STILL doesn't love you One should respect and appreciate you For Who You Are. Not Expect constant change.. that's kinda selfish. i gave her so much to the point that i almost didn't have time for myself anymor - You.. bending over backwards? Wow... Do NOT say sorry for THEIR benefit! SHE is toxic... stay away! Move on.. stay away. Let this be a learning experience for you. Some people will take & take & treat you like crap. When you notice this.. get out of it! (or they bring you down... badly). Work on healing.. and accepting this is done. You do NOT need or want someone like her in your Life. Link to comment
Vernix23 Posted December 7, 2016 Author Share Posted December 7, 2016 thank you everyone for all your great advice..i guess i was really blind cause i loved her too much you were all a great help to me and a great help for motivating me to move forward Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.