g/f recently turned 18, wants to go clubbin...

[.Real Talk.]

i just dont think that this would be a good idea. now, i trust her 100% that she wont go and do anything stupid but its the fact that she'll be goin clubbin and guys will be all over her that gets to me, she just turned 18 and plans on goin to the club w/ her big sister...is it wrong for me to be feelin this way because i know she just wants to have a good time w/ her sis and i dont wanna spoil that but i just feel like she doesn't need to go.

 

 

and just for info. i can't go cuz im only 17...

[emma34]

its totally understandable that you'd be a LITTLE uncomfortable with it. I mean, she's not with you, thereforeeee guys would think she's single, thereforeeee guys will hit on her...i should stop haha. But you trust her! And that's all that matters ain't it? Tell her how you feel - I'm sure she will reassure you. =)

[Bizw]

I've been dealing with my girlfriend going out to clubs 3-4 times a week for over a year. Although I try to trust her, I really know how you feel. You can read my other posts and see the advice other people gave me about this. I'm still wondering how I should feel about this. Read some of my posts though you'll find them interesting, alot of them are about us breaking up due to this but there are also some specifically dealing with your problem.

 

Good luck

[Maverick44]

Here's the deal -

 

Are you a controlling person?

 

Well if you think you're not, then let the person go. If you think you are and you can't deal with them handling themselves, then you are unsure of yourself and you need to deal with that issue.

 

The only person you are ever in control of is yourself. You can watch your gf almost all the time and it will be that one time that you did not that something happens to her. In my mind, i can't stress that much.

 

I think you let her go clubbing and do your things. If she's going to do something, it's going to be whether you voiced your opinion or not.

 

It's ok to feel the way you do but you have to overcome it.

 

Best of luck,

 

Maverick

[sonjam]

Maverick, great advice, I was about to say the same thing. It is not up to you to decide if she can go or not, she can do whatever she wants. And being miserable about it, is not going to improve things either. If you feel insecure, deal with your insecurity. If there is enough trust between you, nothing bad will happen.

[.Real Talk.]

its not that i dont trust her, its the fact that guys will be tryin to dance and talk to her all night that pisses me off. Not that she'll do anything i just dont like that idea at all, i mean i almost got into a fight the other day because he said "can i buy you a drink" to her while we were out somewhere. im jus like that i dont know what to i can do to overcome that problem.

[Prosper]

I will suggest you to reflect a little.

 

What if a girl comes to you, with a pint of beer, and says, 'Can you buy me a drink?' What will you do? Would you feel like fighting with that girl?

 

If your answer is yes for both questions, maybe a psychiatrist can help you better.

[tanned_production]

Its natural for you to be a little worried... my boyfriend told me that when im 18 hes taking me out and showing me all the great clubs and stuff... and when i go without him, it will be with a group of friends and not because i need to meet guys.

 

trust her a little bit eh?

[.Real Talk.]

your right, we talked about it last night and im fine now, its just somethin i gotta get used to i guess.

[Cecelius]

Talking to her was a mistake, but make sure you don't repeat it. If your g/f gets the idea that you're insecure about it, some dude in a club who DOESN'T appear so insecure will be much more attractive.

 

I say encourage her to go out -- tell her its a ton of fun and there are so many good looking people. You should go out too.

 

Just make sure she knows the boundries of what you'll tolerate, and that if she crosses them -- no words, no drama, no pain, no discussion -- you will disappear.

[.Real Talk.]

so your saying talkin to her was a bad idea??

 

lets hope ur not right, im fine with it now she supposed to go out this week and i told her i was fine with it and all. like i said i trust her, im jus bothered a little.