Redabc123 Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Hey everyone, I might be overthinking these situations: Guy #1 I went out on a coffee date last Saturday, nice guy, good conversation, good chemistry. He asked me out on a 2nd date yesterday for Saturday. He said he would find something fun for us to do. He texted me earlier today and said everything was booked up and wanted to know if I wanted come over for a romantic dinner and wine. I just met him and although I want to hang out again I don't want to give off the wrong impression by hanging out his house. Is it to early to go over? If so how can I let him know this without sounding bad. Guy #2 Went on 1st date last Friday...really nice guy great connection BUT he has 3 kids has been divorced twice and has had a vasectomy ( TMI lol) We went on our 2nd date last night, I decided to go just to see if we had chemistry and we do we also shared our first kiss but the baggage that he has is kind of scaring me. Are these red flags? Thanks in advance Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Yes...romantic dinner and wine at his house way to early. There are plenty of restaurants. Not all are booked for Sat. Yes...#2 has a lot of baggage. Link to comment
chamachama Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Guy#1 wants to get laid. Guy#2 Seems like a good bet only if you don't consider children and divorce to be baggage. Personally I think it all depends on the person and what you want from him. The vasectomy can be awesome if you're not looking for children of your own. Ouch just typing that word gave me a stomach ache lol. Divorce being a red flag? Nah millions of people get divorced. Hell, you'll probably get divorced (67% of marriages fail). A red flag is "Why didn't you text me more than three times today?!?" or "I just broke up with my ex of 5 years last week." or "Let's go to my place now after one date. (See guy #1)" or "I know that this is our first date, but I don't want you talking to any other men.". Those are red flags. Children and divorce...not so much. But it depends on if you want kids or not. Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 I am with the others on guy 1 guy two boils down to what you want ..your age as well ...my age group a lot of men havehad the snip or have kids already and don't want more ...so that really is a personal choice for you , it is a huge amount of baggage if you are 21 and want kids Link to comment
Redabc123 Posted February 11, 2015 Author Share Posted February 11, 2015 Yes...romantic dinner and wine at his house way to early. There are plenty of restaurants. Not all are booked for Sat. Yes...#2 has a lot of baggage. Ahh so how do I tell guy #1 no to dinner at his place, Im having a hard time finding the right words to put together That stinks about guy#2 he is so nice Link to comment
Redabc123 Posted February 11, 2015 Author Share Posted February 11, 2015 I am with the others on guy 1 gut two boils down to what you want ..your age as well ...my age group a lot of men havehad the snip or have kids already and don't want more ...so that really is a personal choice for you , it is a huge amount of baggage if you are 21 and want kids That is true , but I want kids and I have never been married and Im going to be 30 in June Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 That is true , but I want kids and I have never been married and Im going to be 30 in June I hate to damn the man because he is divorced , has kids and the snip ..love is love ... twin flames are twin flames ..regardless ... he can have a reversal , he might want to marry again and you may truly love his kids ....it's just a HUGE amount to take on darling ...but that again is your choice . Link to comment
chamachama Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Ahh so how do I tell guy #1 no to dinner at his place, Im having a hard time finding the right words to put together That stinks about guy#2 he is so nice You: Hi Guy #1. Guy #1: Hi! You: Just wanted to say that I won't be coming over your place until I get to know you more. I don't feel comfortable otherwise. If that's not cool with you, then very best of luck to you sir. Guy #1: Ok, that's cool with me. Just kidding about every place in our city and region being booked! I'll find a place then. You: Oh that''s ok feller... I'm not what you're looking for. Try Craigslist. As for Guy #2. I would't write him off so quickly unless you want children. If you want children then no, you'll need to find Guy #3 and #4. Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Just be honest with #1....to early for a Valentine romantic dinner at his house. Suggest Sunday brunch. Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Just be honest with #1....to early for a Valentine romantic dinner at his house. Suggest Sunday brunch. yeah thats deffo a more comfortable option Link to comment
chamachama Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Fiiiiine be all nice and stuff then. Blech! You guys are no fun;p Link to comment
Redabc123 Posted February 11, 2015 Author Share Posted February 11, 2015 Just be honest with #1....to early for a Valentine romantic dinner at his house. Suggest Sunday brunch. Thank you, Ill suggest that Link to comment
Redabc123 Posted February 11, 2015 Author Share Posted February 11, 2015 I hate to damn the man because he is divorced , has kids and the snip ..love is love ... twin flames are twin flames ..regardless ... he can have a reversal , he might want to marry again and you may truly love his kids ....it's just a HUGE amount to take on darling ...but that again is your choice . Thank you, I feel kind of bad like he is almost expecting me to tell him its not going to work. Link to comment
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