Not Sure If I'm Interested, But What Is Going On Here?

[Hindsight2020]

I have a really close girl friend who I've had a platonic friendship with for 2-3 years now. We've never had any romantic history, but over the last few years we've been through a lot. I'm still sort of at the end stages of grieving the relationship I had with my ex, but she has come around to hang out with me nearly 2-3 times a day, and lives a 45 min drive away. I met her through another girl friend of mine in my first year of college, and we never really got close at that point. I ended up dating this girl who was emotionally abusive towards me, and through that I had introduced them. They became good friends, but she also ultimately realized that my ex was not a reliable, trustworthy person. My ex drove me and my friends relationship apart acting as though this girl was pursuing me, but that wasn't unlike any other girl I'd come accross on a daily basis. Our friendship ended (or so I thought) over the summer when we were camping. She ended up finally telling me ex off in front of everyone. I unfortunately didn't know what was going on, and I fired back at her like an idiot trying to defend the person (my ex) who actually started this disaster weekend. She ended up leaving the campsite in tears, driving home. Please note, this was not like me at all. I don't yell at people, and all I did was think about how ty I was afterwards. The relationship went on for a while longer, and I got fed up and left her.

 

Three months later, my friend would seek me out through another friend by asking for my number. It had been 5-6 months since we'd actually spoken. She sent me a text, and apologized for everything that had happened that weekend, and I also did the same. She confirmed with me that I was being manipulated, and that's why she felt she had to reach me. We agreed to hang out, and smooth things over. The one thing that made this a more peaceful experience to me was that I finally got to hear her side of the story, and let me tell you, my ex was worse then I'd even imagined. Hearing the stories gave me peace, and I also realized how much my ex had messed up my friends' relationship with the girl who introduced me to her. Since that day, we've literally hung out every single day, a couple of times day. Most of the time we just hang out in my chilling shed, and talk about pretty much anything. Other days we'll go on adventures in her car to random destinations that sound appealing at the time. She's extremely talkative, but she's always been that way naturally. We've grown closer then we've ever been in a short period of time, and I'm noticing things that she's doing now that she'd never really done before. Let me just say this, she's a very attractive smart girl, but I'm still feeling the effects of my emotionally abusive relationship, and I don't know if I want anything right now.

 

Some of the things I've noticed:

- She laughs at every joke I make, no matter what. And not just a polite laugh either

- She doesn't use the word friend rarely ever if not at all to describe me anymore

- She texts me pretty much every day when she wakes up

- We probably send about a culmination of 75-100 texts a day (on top of hanging out)

- She's started asking me more questions

- Many times now when I've worked, she's sent me a text near the end of my shift saying "I'm in the area, do you need a ride, and want to chill?" (She lives like 45 min away)

- Anytime we look at each other, and nothing is said, she gets this biig smile accross her face, and she nervously laughs

- If I'm busy and she wants to hang out, and I have something short I need to do, she'll chill around the area until I'm finished

- She always tells me she'll drive me whenever I need a ride somewhere (I don't take advantage of this, as I feel bad for making her go out of her way)

- She always contributes to everything we do

- She plays with her hair a lot when I'm talking to her, or when she's talking to me

- She invites me out whenever she wants to go somewhere she thinks is cool (I usually agree with her coolness factors)

- We go driving for hours with no real destination. Just to talk and listen to music

- She always tells me that I'm the best, that I'm amazing, and that I'm awesome a lot

- Her parents think she's seeing someone now

- My parents nag me that she might like me

- Lots of emoticons (mostly smiley faces)

- I'm a musician, and she's went on to people about how talented I am before

- She always enthusiastically wants to help me with my homework

- She's become buddy-buddy with my family and friends

- She's said we should do things like "Get beer, build a fort, and not leave until the beer is gone" which I wasn't sure platonic friends would usually do only cause it sounded like something cute a couple would do

- She always tries to make plans that involve me by myself, and sometimes with my family

- I needed an internship and she went out of her way to email over 30 companies she'd previously done contract work with to help me, then told me later in the day

- Her compliments about me have increased

- When I send her a funny picture, or status. She sends it to all of her friends

- And a plethora of other things

 

 

I do really like hanging out with this girl, but I just feel like if there is something happening, it's happening at the wrong time. My previous relationship has left me confused about my feelings, and I don't want to jump into anything that could potentially hurt someone else. I consider her one of my closest friends too, so I feel like that would be ruthless. What does this sound like, it's been really confusing me. Is she just trying to be a really good friend to me, or is she into me and not saying anything.

[mhowe]

I think she is a good friends...and she really doesn't have a life. How can she be that available?

Does she have a job? Go to school?