Having trouble getting over a fresh breakup

[brigirl92]

My boyfriend of 11 months just broke up with me not even a week ago. His reasoning was legitimate, I don't want to get into great amount of detail, but he didn't see us together long term. This is my first relationship, but I can honestly say he has treated me better than any guy I've been involved with. I understand and actually agree that I'm better off without him, but it's just so hard to get over him. I spent the first two nights balling my eyes out, and the other nights just feeling so indifferent about everything. He says he wants to be friends for life, but the pessimist in me just doesn't want to believe it. I know that potentially we might become strangers to each other over time. He has contacted me a couple times already to ask how I was doing and what not. This break up is even harder because it comes just two months before I was supposed to move to another state to live with him. we have lived together for 5 months already in a different state. He had already made the move a month ago, and I was going to move in when things got settled with his new job. I know our relationship was rushed, so no need to tell me that. My question is how do you get over an amicable breakup where there is still some communication there, where you're still telling each other you love each other. I know it's too early to call the constant communication thing since we just broke up, but still. I hear no contact is the best, but honestly I'm not ready for a world where he doesn't exists in it just some extra info, I'm almost 23 and he was 7 years my senior.

[kbbcoop77]

You have to go No Contact or you won't heal unfortunately. This website helped me a lot in the early days of my breakup after getting dumped:

link removed

 

Please give the guide a read and follow the advice, it helps

Good luck it does get better

[No1]

So this is your first relationship and he has treated you the best of all the guys you have been involved with? I know it hurts but him telling you that its not going to work out is the best thing for you. Now you have your heart free to meet someone better, yes I said someone better. You dont have to worry, wonder, decode, decypher or think about anything he says, does or doesnt do. He is not coming back and that is a great absolution to have. There have been people here who have put their lives on hold and grasping at any little breadcrumbs and all they end up doing is wasting years of their lives. You dont have to do that. I know it hurts.. cry if you have to but know that this is the best thing to happen to you. You are going to find someone better.. hey.. trust me..

[brigirl92]

Thank you for your kind words. I do understand I will meet someone better eventually. Unfortunately, I was already grasping on breadcrumbs and wasted some of my time I graduated May of 2014 with a wonderful degree, I'm not going to lie and say that when I graduated I immediately jumped on my job search. I used quite a bit of time enjoying the no responsibility life lol. But when I did start searching, a lot of it depended on him and where his next job would line up and what not. I felt like I limited my self in that way. Although this breakup hurts, I feel a sense of liberation that now I can put my nose to the grindstone and none of my decisions have to be based on anyone right now. In that I find certainty, a certainty I didn't find in my relationship, although I consider my relationship to be very good in other aspects. I'll just try to keep myself busy in the meantime. I don't plan on dipping in the dating pool anytime soon.

[brigirl92]

You have to go No Contact or you won't heal unfortunately. This website helped me a lot in the early days of my breakup after getting dumped:

 

Please give the guide a read and follow the advice, it helps

Good luck it does get better

 

Thank you. I looked at this guide and I feel a lot better now. Going to try to keep myself busy and my mind distracted from this.

[kbbcoop77]

Good I'm glad it helped u. It really helped me.