simply_r Posted December 25, 2004 Share Posted December 25, 2004 my ex hasn't contacted for the past month....... i dont know if its because he doesnt want too or if it cuz he's really busy. The last time we spoke, he said he had some things to work out and i also know that this is his busiest time at work for the entire year, but i keep thinking abt him. I tried calling once but he didnt answer his cell phone and i msged him but he never replied, that was abt 2 weeks ago...... do u think i should msg him to say merry christmas? if i dont get a reply, i'd be really hurt Link to comment
Switch187 Posted December 25, 2004 Share Posted December 25, 2004 Well I would say no, don't send it. You already tried to make contact with him and he hasn't responded. Yeah he may be busy at work and stuff, but people always find a way to contact the people that mean something to him. It's not that hard to give a quick 2 minute call to say hi back to you and say the he's really busy. Also you already know how bad you would feel if he doesn't reply back to you, so why put yourself through that. It sounds like you only want to send it just so he would call/contact you, but then you know that your going to feel really down if he doesn't. I would just leave it alone. You've done what you can and he hasn't shown any effort to try and contact you. Just have a Merry Christmas with your family/friends and leave him be, if he really wants to contact you he will put in the effort to get it done. Link to comment
Prosper Posted December 25, 2004 Share Posted December 25, 2004 Hi Pal, U should! If u wan to do it, just do it! Just say merry xmas and hey can u get back to me when u are free. say something like u are bored stiff. haha! he will understand Link to comment
DivineNess Posted December 25, 2004 Share Posted December 25, 2004 I dont think you should contact him, you will probably end up getting hurt. If you have tried to get in contact with him before and he never responded then you shouldnt expect a response this time either. He probably just doesnt want to lead you on and give you any hope of getting back together which is what it looks like you are hoping for. Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted December 25, 2004 Share Posted December 25, 2004 it sucks, b/c im in the same boat as you, but i agree with Switch 100%. keep your Christmas merry, even w/o your ex. -DG724 Link to comment
mtastic Posted December 25, 2004 Share Posted December 25, 2004 I agree with the others. Don't contact him, its better for you that way. You won't have to sit around worrying about weither or not he'll respond. Just try and enjoy the holidays with family, and hopefully that will take your mind off him for a while. happt holidays, mtastic Link to comment
HajiMaji Posted December 25, 2004 Share Posted December 25, 2004 Yeah. Dont call. Im sorry that i agree, and im really hoping i can take my own advice. Its hard not to call, but dont do it Link to comment
Prue Posted December 25, 2004 Share Posted December 25, 2004 I was in the same boat until about an hour or so ago when I actually sent the text message. I'm a little sorry I did it now. I think it's really a shame that things didn't work out between me and my ex, and truly believe that he should have given me the chance I deserved and we could have been happy - but fact is he didn't. And saying "Merry Christmas" via SMS wasn't going to do a thing to change it. In fact he may have even had a laugh about it... I will never know since I haven't received a reply yet and don't think I will. And anyway... if things are to work out better for you in the future with your ex (and sometimes they do)... you might get further by giving things time than sending any text messages. Good luck - and have a good Christmas Link to comment
hockeyboy Posted December 25, 2004 Share Posted December 25, 2004 i contacted an ex for xmas. an ex ex...a girl i dated for 4 years. it was easier for me cause this girl i have no desire to get back with but would like to be on good terms with. the last time we talked before this she told me she hated me, called me every name in the book and we had a big blowout. i called her and wished her a merry christmas and we actually had a good talk. its good to know we can live our lives and not hold grudges. when you called before and left a message, what did you say in it? Link to comment
simply_r Posted December 26, 2004 Author Share Posted December 26, 2004 hi ppl... i didnt msg or call him but strangely, i got a msg from him early this morning to say merry christmas. I replied but i'm not sure if he even got the message bcuz there's a problem with mobile phones at the moment where i live. I tried calling later in the day but no answer, what should i do now? Link to comment
Switch187 Posted December 26, 2004 Share Posted December 26, 2004 Give it a day or two. That's cool that he took the inititive to make the contact to you (even if was just for a happy holidays), and if you sent the message and he didn't get it thats cool. Don't stress on it too much, if he was interested in hearing from you he won't mind waiting a day for you to get your things together and wait for service in your area to work. Link to comment
Prue Posted December 26, 2004 Share Posted December 26, 2004 I want to take back what I said before... I did get my reply in the end, and it was great. In fact he's indicated that he wants us to start over. Turns out it was the right thing to do Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted December 26, 2004 Share Posted December 26, 2004 wow jacy! im surprised things worked out so well for you, they usually arent this easy...indeed this was a merry christmas. -DG724 Link to comment
Switch187 Posted December 26, 2004 Share Posted December 26, 2004 Yeah congragulations Jacy on your very Merry Christmas. Starting over is a good thing, and hopefully this time around things go good for the two of you. Link to comment
Prue Posted December 29, 2004 Share Posted December 29, 2004 Perhaps still not as easy as it sounds. That texting ended with him saying he what he wants, me saying I'dlike that too and that we should catch up -and now nothing since. Right back to wondering when I'll hear and whether to contact him. What a strange place for the conversation to end huh? Link to comment
ajk Posted December 29, 2004 Share Posted December 29, 2004 jacy--yey!!!!! what good news! i am so happy for you. that lifted my heart today it is great to see relationships progress in a positive way keep us up to date on it...and seek advice often! yes, it is hard work still, but stay patient and it will happen. simply r--i agree with switch...give it a day or two. breathe deeply until then. he'll contact you. ajk Link to comment
simply_r Posted December 30, 2004 Author Share Posted December 30, 2004 well here's an update, i found out that he didn't get my messages and neither did i get any of his saying that he was going away on vacation.. well he's away for a few weeks and i still cant stop thinking about him.. I just wish that this was easier.... jacy wait a few days, not too long though and try to contact him at least once. If it is meant to be, it will work out Link to comment
Prue Posted December 31, 2004 Share Posted December 31, 2004 I actually did text a fairly non chalent message early this evening (New Year's Eve). Reason being that he replied and we had that entire previous conversation from a number different to his. I wasn't sure if he ever got my last message (eg. he could have been using a friend's phone if he ran out of credit). The other reason (not that I would tell him so) was that I assume he was partying that night, and don't know if it was only the drinks talking and not him. So if I got a reply to this one as well, my reasons to get hopeful might have been confirmed at least. I haven't gotten a reply this time and don't know that I will, but I don't particularly regret it this time. I couldn't want to be with anyone more than him, and I care so much. But I've been trying to get this back on track for 9 months now... and it's going to be a brand new year in a few hours. I will not be spending another year like this, and right at this moment now, there's no one letting me know that I'm not going into this year alone. That's ok in itself I guess, but I don't want to play games to win someone back anymore, no matter how I feel. All the rules regarding when it is and isn't ok to call, should I or should I not text, contact, no contact... it must be possible to feel this way about someone and not have all of this go with it. This message isn't meant to sound negative after what I thought was very good news. I'm more positive as ever that I am going to have a happy new year and I wish the same to all of you. I will keep you posted, but I won'tbe asking whether to text, call etc... or not anymore. He knows my number, knows I've tried and that's about it. I think it's a shame if he decides not to get in touch and I'd really like him to, but nothing is put on hold for it. Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted December 31, 2004 Share Posted December 31, 2004 "I will keep you posted, but I won'tbe asking whether to text, call etc... or not anymore. He knows my number, knows I've tried and that's about it. I think it's a shame if he decides not to get in touch and I'd really like him to, but nothing is put on hold for it." KUDOS TO YOU!!! i too am starting the new year with a similar mindset. youre a strong gal. keep it up! -DG724 Link to comment
simply_r Posted January 2, 2005 Author Share Posted January 2, 2005 i agree, a new year and he was in the past..... if he wants me in his future, he's going to have to make that effort. But i have my own life to live and i'm going to continue to do that until i find someone, whoever it is Link to comment
Prue Posted January 3, 2005 Share Posted January 3, 2005 It still upsets me a little, although I try not to let it. He sent me 6 text messages that night in total. All wishing me the best, apologising for anything he's done, reassuring me that it wasn't my fault, and wanting to see me again because he enjoyed all the time he spent with me. And it seems now that not a word of it was genuine. And on Christmas Day. I was so fooled wasn't I? I don't know why it is that when I think of him, the most prominent thoughts in my head are still the good things. Link to comment
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