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I have been maintaining NC for three months now. My exbf and me see each other now and then but dont converse. I act totally indifferent when he and I are at the same place. I think that has started disturbing him.

He send out two emails to me past week. Not to me alone but included me in his friends list.


And although I didnt reply to the first one. For the second one. I emailed him saying thank you for some information he had sent out to me and his friends.


Will this just plain thank you email, send all my efforts down to the drain.


Inspite of the advice of some veterans here I did this stupid thing.


What do you guys think

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Hey there, just chill!


I don't know your full story, but I can't see how your reply could be a bad thing. You were controlled and calm; polite and friendly. If you do have any contact with your ex that's the best way to be. If you are on his mailing list that's good (assuming you want that). If he wanted nothing more to do with you then you wouldn't be on it.


I would say your ex MAY be bothered by your indifference towards him, especially if you are doing it in face to face situations. He will have noticed it I assure you. It doesn't matter what you intend to get by doing the NC and indifference it's all good. I am in semi-regular contact with my ex, but I do at least manage to stay calm and controlled, be friendly and funny.


Don't worry too much, just continue on as you were.

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We all slip sometimes, we're only human. I wouldn't worry to much about it. Just jump back on the wagon. On the plus side, your thank you response was very adult of you. It made you look better, more mature about the whole thing, then him. Continuing your email responses would be a different matter altogether, and could set you back. Don't go there with him. You've worked to hard for that.

P.S. I hate it when they use the old, your name in the mail list, tactic. It is a very cowardly way to communicate. He knew exactly what he was doing when he added your name to his mail list.

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hi evy

thanks for the reply.

The mailing list thing worries me. I feel I might have made a fool out of myself by saying thank you. May be he had completely forgotten that I was in the mailing list and sent out the email.


It make me look so stupid

Anyways I hope that the damage was not too much.

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No need to feel stupid. He didn't just....woops.....accidentally put you on his mailing list. If you've been maintaining NC for this long and all of a sudden got 2 emails, he intentionally put you on there.


We all have felt stupid at one point or another, I say as long as it wasn't a long email, it's fine. A polite thanks means nothing at all.


Chin up!

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  • 1 year later...

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