Lying

[Deeplydepressed]

This is another post about my ex boyfriend for those of you who know me. When I last talked to my ex boyfriend he said a relationship wouldn't work, but I'm thinking he was fine with being friends so to speak. Well, he recently found out I lied to him about alot of things such as my virginity( he didn't know I was technically a virgin) my rape ( instead of telling him I was raped I told him I slept with a bunch of guys cause at the time I wasn't ready) and about how I felt about him when we were together because I was scared. Well, now he is blazing mad at me. All he had to say was that I was a liar. I do accept that lying is never ever acceptable, and that I was in the wrong to lie like that to someone I supposedly loved, but when he said he didn't want to sleep with a virgin I guess I decided I'd be whatever he wanted me to be. I had done sexual things before just not tradtional sex. So I'm asking what to do think I should write this guy back? I don't necessarily need to be his best friend, but I do want to be on good terms.

[Switch187]

Well your ex is actually being very diss-respectful to you after finding out what he did. Yeah I understand that he would be upset that you lied to him in the beginnig, but for him to be pissed at you for not telling him about your rape is very unconsiderate. Yeah lying is never acceptable, but in your situation some things should be permited. You didn't want him to know you were raped, so you said something else, that's understandable. I don't understand why he would tell you that he didn't want to sleep with a virgin, because then I have to wonder what he would have done if you said you were one. Would he have just dumped you, or would he have been more considerate of the fact that you wanted him to have your virginity? Anyways if you write him back I think you need to just lay things out on the line, let him know lying was wrong, but what happened to you in your past wasn't something that you were ready to talk about yet. Also tell him that if he is that mad at you for it, then thats his problem, because most guys would be way more supportive after finding out that a girl was raped in her life.

[Prosper]

Hi Pal,

I am glad u know lying is a very horrible thing to begin with for a friendship.

But i guess u need to sort things out with the guy, cause seeming from what i read from the way u express urself, he would have seen the rape as a sort u induce urself into one. That is why he sounds so 'blaringly mad'.

And YES! u shld write him back and tell him how u feel, what u had gone thru and all the 'sexual things before just not tradtional sex', to let him have a better understanding of u and u to make a better judgement so as to see if he is an ideal person to be ur friend.

AND YES! most guys are very supportive when comes to such issues, they somehow dun like their own species to betray their MANHOOD! LoLx!

 

Thanks for reading and good luck to u

[Deeplydepressed]

He didn't reply back at all and I''m sad about it, but what can I do huh. I think I'll go post in the breaking up forum right now.