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Interracial/cultural/long-distance/age-gap/language barrier/orphan relationship?


nastrow

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I'm a 21 year old American who has never had a relationship and I feel like I am hitting it off with this 17 year old orphan Haitian girl who speaks almost no English (though I am slowly picking up her language). This will be my 3rd non-consecutive month in Haiti. I'm not sure she even likes me like that. She seems to react much better to me giving her more attention in private. If I am too public about it she becomes closed off and pretty much ignores me. If I am more private she will initiate interactions with me in public and private and seems to desire my attention, along with laughing at most things I say. Anyways, she seems mature to me, and it doesn't feel like there are that many differences (especially when I am here with her in Haiti) but when you think about it there are soooooo many. On top of this if I come back next summer I may not see much of her as she may be staying at the real orphanage being built (right now she just stays in the house and in the care of the family I am staying with). I feel like she, along with the other orphan girls, have been a very positive influence on my life over the past 7 months since I first visited Haiti. I want to keep her in my life, even if it's just as a friend, but I feel like we may be both very attracted to each other and have good chemistry. IDK what to do it's seems so crazy and stupid sometimes. I'm going talk to my friends in charge soon. This thing is just so alien to me... thanks for any help.

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Hmmm, she seems interested when no one else is around, but in public, she doesn't want anyone else to know?? I'm sorry, but, to me, this is a red sign.

 

Personally, I don't think there is any real age gap here to speak of unless it's illegal for you to hook up with her (I don't know what the age of consent is in Haiti). And you're not some seedy old man, so I wouldn't worry about taking advantage of the poor orphan girl.

 

However, if I was having doubts about whether it was a good idea to get involved with someone, I'd listen to those doubts.

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