ForeverFree81 Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 Just thought I would write this to let you all know I am single again. He messaged me tonight and ended things in a text mesage, before messaging my friend and has been cracking onto her; she has been rude in her replies and is not interested, etc. I just wanted to say thankyou to everyone who has commented on my posts asking for help or advice, it has made things easier to bear. Im not terribly sad, like its hard and was kinda brutal the way he did it, but I guess I'll just have to be ok. Thanks again guys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iamstrong Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 You will ABSOLUTELY make it through this love! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Dark Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 Time to concentrate on yourself as you intend to Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForeverFree81 Posted October 21, 2013 Author Share Posted October 21, 2013 I knew things were over for a while now.. He hadnt talked to me in a fortnight, refused to say goodbye to me when I left his house, etc. Im trying to better myself now, mostly mentally and emotionally as I am sick of being hurt by guys. Im in no rush for my next relationship or anything, I just wanna know if/whe it happens, I am ready to deal with it. I behaved like an adult the whole way thru the relationship, he is the one who behaved like a child, and he will regret it. Hes hung up on his ex, was dating me and is interested in my friend. Hes a messed up individual, who has thrown away a diamond while chasing 2 very, very uninterested stones, and its his loss. But thanks for the support, it wont be easy, but Im determined to be ok. I will never go back to him after this, and until tonight, we had gone no contact for the last 2 weeks, so really, its not so bad. I have had time to process it, I had every intention of calling him tomorrow night (exactly 14 days since I left) and ending it then. He decided to be a coward and dump me in a text, thats fine. Hes the one who looks like a jerk for doing that, espeially when he promised to never hurt me, and never end things thru text, when he knew thats how my last boyfriend ended things with me, and he knew how much it hurt. But whatever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iamstrong Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 A bloke dating you and showing an interest in several other birds is an immature chump, love! He shows a lack of character, concern and a questionable value system. I would be grateful to be rid of him. If you end up as passing mates: if not, not an issue! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForeverFree81 Posted October 21, 2013 Author Share Posted October 21, 2013 Yeah I know, Im way better off without him. I kow I deserve better, but its still hard, like regardless of how bad it is, when theres a breakup, your self esteem/self worth still takes a hit. Just feeling a bit sad/worthless/angry I guess. I havent had any sleep either. And Im not sure why, coz I kinda knew it was coming, but I guess part of me always hoped he was going to realise what he had in front of him and change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Dark Posted October 21, 2013 Share Posted October 21, 2013 We can not help what we feel regardless of what the person we were with has already done to us. We can not help our reactions to a painful event we never wanted. We grieve the loss when we know it is definite. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForeverFree81 Posted October 22, 2013 Author Share Posted October 22, 2013 It is definitely a definite end. I dont want him back, I hate who he has become and I feel relieved that its over, but it still hurts. I wish I could make smarter choices and not care as much. So sick of feeling like I dont matter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Dark Posted October 22, 2013 Share Posted October 22, 2013 While he turned out to be bad for you and most likely the next person who he has somehow seduced into his life, you did a smart thing by wanting to end it despite a part of you not wanting to. It's a hard thing to do and can quite easily fail when still hoping and romanticizing the thought of our partner changing. Even when we know someone for years, when in a relationship, they can be someone totally different, wondering how this person could have even been a best friend. In my personal opinion people change within the relationship since there are more emotional dynamics involved. Boundaries to keep within. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForeverFree81 Posted October 22, 2013 Author Share Posted October 22, 2013 Im not going back to him. I dont give second chances, not where relationships are concerned. I have pretty much woken up this morning having lost all faith in men, relationships and finding someone who is going to make me happy. And that is whats breaking my heart right now, not what that jerk did. I feel like I have finally broken. I have been cheated on, lied to, abused in every possible way, and now I have been used by someone who I thought would be the last person to hurt me. I just feel like I have finally broken, and I hate it so much, like I dont want to be, but I woke up this morning feeling so damaged inside, like all my breakups are haunting me at once and its just left me feeling like I mean nothing to anyone, now or ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Dark Posted October 22, 2013 Share Posted October 22, 2013 It's understandable to feel like there is no faith in finding a partner who will treat you as you wish to be treated. When the same results keep occurring without doing anything to provoke such behavior. We can not control hurt. When someone or a situation which hurts us happens, it is what we are going to feel. We have to deal with each day which becomes easier over time even though it can seem like too long. As long as you keep working on yourself, to be the best person you can be while having support from people who do care and do understand. Breaking up with someone does not have to be all about healing. It can be a reason to better yourself in ways you always wanted to. It can bring on a determination which would have never been possible without it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForeverFree81 Posted October 22, 2013 Author Share Posted October 22, 2013 I feel like I am out of options when it comes to dealing with things right now. I just feel like a shell of myself, and like I have no self worth. I just want to run away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Dark Posted October 22, 2013 Share Posted October 22, 2013 Try not to allow the past make you believe you are worthless. You must try not allow the past to be a representation of he future. There is no running from the past and from memories. Stay strong and look for support when you need it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uniqueme Posted October 23, 2013 Share Posted October 23, 2013 All the best! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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