Want to take my friendship to the next level, but...

[sungsam]

i have this really great female friend... we're both in out late 20's... we've been friends for about a year and to date have kept things strictly platonic. when we initially met it was under the premise of a date, but nothing physical happened between us, we really like hanging out together so we kept hanging out and developed this great friendship. well i dunno what happened but a week or so ago these feelings for her hit me like a ton of bricks, confused i sat on it for a few days and then i decided to say something. well just as we started to talk, she got a call that her father was being rushed to the ER, she said she REALLY wanted to continue the conversation the following day. I said ok, and to keep me posted about her dad. We stayed in contact via phone all week as her dad was sick (it just wasnt possible for me to be there with her). In the days that followed her dad's condition worsened and ultimately within a weeks time he passed away. As you can imagine we never got to finish our conversation, as always I've been there for her in her time of need and now while shes been mourning, but these overwhelming feelings for her are making me nuts. I want to pick up the conversation we kind of left off, but I kind of feel its in-appropriate now, or better yet thats what im being told by those around me. It's been a couple of days now since the funeral and she's not terribly distraught, we'll most likely be going out to eat soon, do you think its ok to say something to her now? Any advice would be great! Thanks.

[ImAGuy]

i would hold off for a bit but show her that you care which i guess your doing,...after all her dad did juss pass away so it would still be in her mind and i think it could make her mad bringing it up unless she asked thats a different story

[Mun]

Hey there,

definitely spend time with her, but don't confess your feelings just yet. Even though she appears calm on the outside, she might not be ready to hear something like this so soon after her loss. If her mind is not clear she may not give you a good answer to whatever you tell her. Let some more time pass before you bring this up.

 

You don't want to confuse her right now, or appear rude in any way .

 

Best of luck

[sungsam]

thanks for the advice. it's hard to keep this all in, but i guess i have to for now. i just kep feeling like one of her other (not so close) guy friends is going to say something... they all seem to be coming out the woodworks since the funeral. i guess if that happens and she goes for it then so be it, just wasnt meant to be.