Nifty_Swifty1 Posted November 18, 2004 Share Posted November 18, 2004 Well, I'm just going to complain a bit. Mostly about myself, and the strange paradoxes I find myself in. First off is the fact that no mater how well a girl matches up with the conventional view of beauty I never find them attractive until I get to know them. Some of you may think that would be a good thing, but it's not. You always find yourself being smashed into the just friends category long before you really get to know someone, and for me that means that by the time I start finding someone attractive it's much to late. I many times wish I could be like everyone else and just find someone attractive right off the bat and be able to pursue a relationship before it's too late, but things just don't work out like that for the few people I do meet. The longer I'm alone, the more I loathe who I am. Why can't I have the connection with people that I see everyone else having. Going home every night to an empty house is the most unbearable feeling I can imagine. I can't call it my home because that isn't where my heart is. It's anywhere but there. I'll go out to the mall late at night just to be around people and away form the emptiness of my house. I'll sit in a bar by myself just to have those extra hours where I can hear someone's voice. Where I live is that last place on earth that I would want to be. I no longer sleep; I just wander around trying to find someone, anyone that will have something to do with me, but the simple fact that I have no one makes me look all the more desperate. I guess I'm not really looking for advice, but if anyone has something that could help feel free to give your advice. I was just complaning Quote Link to comment
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