is she being honest? is it worth it?

[Prelude8grand]

my girlfriend has met this guy who claims he has a girlfriend himself but my friend who goes to his college knows he dosnt. anways he claims he just wants to be friends with her but he calls everyday and i have answered twice and he makes up some lame exscuse for calling. i love this girl more than anything but i feel like its not fair for her to go hang out with someone who obviously wants more than a relationship. im i over reacting? recently she wanted to take a break so she could go hang out with this kid without me being able to say no. the main reason most of this is happening is b/c she met this girl who loves to get around and i know she is a bad influince on her but my girl claims she is a really nice girl who means well. the problem is i know she dosnt mean well. im doing this b/c its got me so upset that i cant sleep and eat anymore im soo stressed out. another thing is to when she is with this girl she wont answer her phone or if she does she wont tell me where she is or what she is doing. WHAT DO I DO? IM SO STRESSED AND CONFUISED.[/i]

[magpie]

i can see your frustration. i was in a similar situation recently, except i saw no harm in my boyfriend hanging out with this female friend, i felt our connection was great and that there was no harm. HAHA! now we are no longer together and he is sleeping with her. not to freak you out. but i guess the moral of the story is trust your instincts and be honest with yourself. dont say to yourself "im going to be the better person and give a nod of approval" if you really dont feel like it. tell your girlfriend how you feel. if she still is insistant that she maintain a personal one-on-one friendship with this person, then you need to ask why? i would love to say trust her, but its not that easy. people are attracted to temptation, challenge. and its so easy to cross the line without knowig it was crossed. i mean, if this guy kisses her neck when shes not expecting it, how will she react? what will this bring up in her? its hard to tell. she may not even know at this point. i guess all i can really say is that whatever will be, will be. if she is going to fall into temptation, it will happen eventually, and whether or not you even know of this other person. life is full of temptation, and i guess one of our challenges is to find someone who through thick and thin will resist. and again, the only way to know this is through time. but a good indicator is found in asking yourself this..."if she KNOWS that this person is interested and that you are uncomfortable about the situation, does she respect you and your relationship to just let it be?" she owes her commitment and affections to YOU, not a new friend.

[Klingsor]

Dude, if you trust your girl, you should get off her back and let her do whatever she wants, with whomever she wants, and no harm will come of it, because she's a trustworthy girl.

 

If you don't trust her, you should get rid of her now, whether she's sleeping with this particular guy (yet) or not. Why would you want to be in a relationship with someone you don't trust anyway?

 

And I couldn't tell for sure from your post, but if she's gone away to college and you're living in another city, it might be best to just let her go, as this is a very hard time to do a distance thing.

 

Magpie - The best thing that as$hole could have done for you is leave you. It might have hurt for a week or two, but if he'd stayed, it would hurt for a whole lot longer.

[cs20thcenturyfox]

Hello Prelude8grand,

 

First of all you either trust your girl or not. Second she's an adult, right? So you shouldn't really worry too much or hate on her friend. Your girl is doing what she chooses to do herself, I don't think her friend is holding a gun to her head. In the end we all pay for the things we do, good luck