My thinking is abnormal

[Justme3]

I decided to join a dating site. I met this nice man and we met for dinner. He seemed nice and talkative. We also met once more for dinner then the third time we met at a city an hour away from where I live. When I got there and saw him I realized he wasn't for me. He was dressed shabby and didnt even seem like he brushed his hair.

Anyway, that city brought lots of memories for me from a guy I dated for about 3 years. Thoughts of him kept bombarding my mind. When I drove home I couldn't stop thinking of him. I passed the exit where he used to live and I just felt like I missed him terribly. Can anyone shed any light to this. I feel so not normal. It's not rational thinking.

[erzerum7]

I decided to join a dating site. I met this nice man and we met for dinner. He seemed nice and talkative. We also met once more for dinner then the third time we met at a city an hour away from where I live. When I got there and saw him I realized he wasn't for me. He was dressed shabby and didnt even seem like he brushed his hair.

Anyway, that city brought lots of memories for me from a guy I dated for about 3 years. Thoughts of him kept bombarding my mind. When I drove home I couldn't stop thinking of him. I passed the exit where he used to live and I just felt like I missed him terribly. Can anyone shed any light to this. I feel so not normal. It's not rational thinking.

 

I think you were too quick to discard the first guy based on his being dressed shabbily and not brushing his hair that day. Who knows why he looked like that? Did you ask him? Regardless, I would have given him another date before dismissing him.

 

And yes, your think is normal (there's a note of nostalgia there), but I wouldn't contact the guy from 3 years ago.

[jungledrums]

I think you were too quick to discard the first guy based on his being dressed shabbily and not brushing his hair that day. Who knows why he looked like that? Did you ask him? Regardless, I would have given him another date before dismissing him.

 

And yes, your think is normal (there's a note of nostalgia there), but I wouldn't contact the guy from 3 years ago.

 

 

Why shouldn't she contact the guy she dated 3 years ago? I say she should send him and email or text to see how he's doing. Who knows? It may be the start of a new relationship.

 

As for this other guy, the outward appearance can be fixed, but what about his personality and character? Is that something you like?

[Justme3]

The guy that bombarded my mind, I dated him for 3 years. Actually, we broke up 3 months before I dated the last guy which ended terribly for me (if you read my previous thread.) I don't an to contact him, but all these thoughts of him just seemed so odd.

As for the guy I met. This was third time I saw him and I realize he just isn't my type. He seems nice, but I don't think our personalities are compatible. I think him not choosing to fix himself up to meet me kinda helped with what I was thinking all along.

[Sportster2005]

I decided to join a dating site. I met this nice man and we met for dinner. He seemed nice and talkative. We also met once more for dinner then the third time we met at a city an hour away from where I live. When I got there and saw him I realized he wasn't for me. He was dressed shabby and didnt even seem like he brushed his hair.

Anyway, that city brought lots of memories for me from a guy I dated for about 3 years. Thoughts of him kept bombarding my mind. When I drove home I couldn't stop thinking of him. I passed the exit where he used to live and I just felt like I missed him terribly. Can anyone shed any light to this. I feel so not normal. It's not rational thinking.

 

If your thinking is abnormal I must be stark raving mad.

 

I think it's normal to reminisce about times we perceive as better. Especially after a disappointment. Nostalgia can be comfortable place to temporarily escape to. And if you are still thinking about this guy once the dust settles, look him up.

[Debbie27]

There is more to someone than how they look, you should have given him a chance. Your ex is your ex for a reason, you can t go back have to look forward x

[Justme3]

Thanks you guys for your input. My mind is still filled with thoughts of him. I just hope it subsides by tomorrow. Debbie is right and I'm not going to contact him. I agree with u sportster as well. Maybe just nostalgia. The constant thoughts and images of him just overwhelmed me. So bizarre

As for the other guy. I know he's just not for me. We're just too different. If he contacts me again, I will let him know I'm only interested as a friend.