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Confused about what my ex is doing


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First time posting on enotalone, It has been a huge help for me while I been trying to move on. So a little back round, My ex and I were together for over 3 years. We were both each others first everything. Around Christmas time, we got in a huge fight over her being out drinking all night long while she had work the next morning. She was drunk when we fought. My friends, who were at the party, said the minute we got off the phone she called and texted this kid from work, she just started working there for about a month at this time. We didn't talk for a couple days because I thought she was in the wrong and was waiting for her to say sorry and she was doing the same. It seems like this friend from work was there for her while we were fighting and she fell for him.(that last sentence is my Point of view of what happen) We had our break up/closure talk. It didn't really go well because she lied about everything with him. I knew but just wanted the truth from her.


So, after our talk, I did the dumb things of sending flowers to her work and writing her a long letter of my love for her. I regret these things and also telling her "I'll always be there no matter what and I'll wait for her." I regret it from the sense that i'll be on the back burner and that she can just always come back like nothing happen. They started going out about a week after our talk. Then throughout the beginning/middle of January, we would go back and forth on Facebook and twitter. She would say things like "i'm so happy with him", "happy as ****" and "never been so happy in my life." I would respond with things like "How could you do this to someone you loved and cared about" and so forth. Finally, my brother stepped in and told me to stop showing that I care. She wants to see me respond and i'm playing a game I cannot win. So around a month ago, I stopped and wrote her a finally goodbye pretty much saying it was wrong for how she ended the relationship;The truth would have hurt but I would still of respected you for telling me.


We have been NC for about a month now. She stopped with the happy things and started saying things like I treated her like s**t, she wasted so much time on me and she was happy I cried when she broke my heart. I haven't respond in anyway in the past 3 weeks. I think she says these things to get a reaction from me. I honestly don't know why someone with a boyfriend would post these about an ex or why the new partner would allow it. Now, what is confusing me: On Saturday at 1 am, she texted my mom saying "Hey, hope you're doing good. We will have to catch up." She has my number blocked from what I am told. My question is she trying to find out information about what I am doing, still trying to get an reaction from me or just saying hi to my mom? They were friendly to each other but never texted each other before. Another weird thing is that it was at 1 am on a Saturday, I don't get that either. If it might help, a couple of weeks ago, she texted my best friend a paragraph of all these bad things that were going on then respond about an hour later "oops, wrong text." All help is appreciated! Thanks in advanced!

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Hi Lochhead - Welcome to ENA. I offer no explanation of her actions, other than her unhappiness with you and interest in the new guy didnt each just happen after the drunk fight. The drunk fight was just the catalyst for her to do what she most likely had been considering doing.


As for advice, I would take all her words and actions for exactly what the appear to be and come to terms with the fact that this isn't a bump in the road, this is the end of the relationship.

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Edmund Exley, I agree that this was probably was the catalyst for her to do what she did. I come to terms that it is over but not fully over it yet. I been on two group dates with the same girl. They went well but I don't believe i'm ready for any relationship yet.


HeartGoesOn, Yeah, what my brother told me, she's just seeing if I still care. She did get me to bite the first couple of weeks but I see what it is now. I have to admit, I was going to take my mother's phone and say stop texting my mom but I feel like that what she wants. That is exactly why I am moving on and not trying to get her back, she showed me how immature she is by not telling me the truth and playing these games.


Thanks for the response guys! Still confused about why she is posting these things with a boyfriend and why he's even allowing it. If my girlfriend was posting stuff about an ex, I would think they're not ready for a relationship.

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