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I been with this girl for a year and a half. The 3 month we were together I cheated on her and it was a mistake. She didn't find out till 3 weeks later and she left me for a day and came back. We been having problems since then and she got pregnant. While she was pregnant she left me again to live with her mom and I kept begging her to come back and after 3 months passed she came back. We had fought alot. She would always accuse me of cheating and lieng to her. Now we have a 3 month old baby girl. When she wasn't pregnant anymore I kept thinking she was doing stuff behind my back so I kept blaming her and1 day we got into it I laid a hand on her and that's when she left me. Now she lives at her moms and she keeps saying mean stuff to me and saying your nothing to me. She said were separated and she wants to see if I can change. Then she tells me she will come back. I really need help. Thank you

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Separation means that you are not together for now. It can mean that the marriage will be over soon or that you will get back together. But for now, you are NOT together.


She will need to really see that change so she can trust that you have definitely changed. Have you cheated or lied to her in the past 6 months?

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Yes I have and she knows... I just don't know what to do I'm too depressed and I'm finding out that she's going to party's and drinking and smoking and she has a 3month old baby at home..


Depression and anxiety can weigh you down a lot and not let you really make the changes you need to to get her back. If you are really serious about her, you need to get your act together. Go in for counseling, and give her some space. She is probably going to parties and drinking to drown out what she feels about you and how much she is hurt.


Quite often, just telling her that you have changed wont work. She has to see it. Besides, changes dont come overnight. It takes time. So give her some time and space and work on yourself. She wants to see if you can change, so show her you can. If the love you shared was true, she will come back to you.


All the best.

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Just yesterday when I went to go see my baby I asked so where's the ring? And got all defensive and told me to get out. Her sister came started hitting me. she started hitting me her crazy mom started yelling at me so I got up grabbed her phone said I bought this so I took it and she freaked on me looks like she was hiding something in there. I looked through it turns out she made a different Facebook added a whole bunch of guys and flirted with them. Why was she scared that I would see that stuff if she didn't care about me?

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Well, I think you should introspect on yourself as a person. Whatever stuff she does is her private business. From your end, really put in an effort for yourself as a person. I'm sure she really cares about you, so you should show you really care about yourself.

When you take actions to change (whether its counseling or what) - let her know what you're doing so she gets involved in your progress.

Always, always act positively towards her, put your hurt and anger aside. Even if you feel it - always act very respectfully towards her and her family.

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