taylorb Posted November 1, 2004 Share Posted November 1, 2004 Why can't I just let go? In short: I'm the one who was with the Kiwi. Now his ex has resurfaced and he's feeling confused. So he wants to be alone to figure things out. I was pretty much his rebound (but didn't want to accept it). So I've been keeping in light, friendly contact with him (not asking about his ex or anything). However, on Friday a colleague of mine (the one that actually introduced me to the kiwi in the first place), told me that she heard that the kiwi was going on a ski trip where the ex would be there as well. I asked if she thought if they were back together. She said she thought so. Impulsively, I called him to ask if it was true. I just needed to hear it from him. I just needed closure. I left a message that was quite upbeat despite the circumstances. Telling him that "I didn't want to pressure him, but I heard that he was back with his ex and if he could please give me a call to let me know if it was true." He called back right away. He told me that it wasn't true. That he was still alone. That they weren't back together. I apologized to him for making the call, but he reassured me that it was okay and that he understood. So I felt much better after that. On Sunday I left him a brief message (because I was on a ski trip with friends) telling him how wonderful the ski conditions were. He called back and thanked me for the call and wished me a safe trip home. So why couldn't I just leave it at that? Why did I feel the need to call him after I got home? What a loser! So I called him when I got back. He picked up the phone, but sounded distant. I felt so stupid for calling. I felt like the big nerd in school who shows up at a party univited and noone wants them there. I felt like the clingy annoying girl.... I wanted to ask him what was wrong, but I didn't. We talked for a little. He asked me a few questions. I asked him a few questions. And because he sounded distant (and almost down), I tried to get off the phone as soon as possible. I told him to have a nice evening. He wished me the same. And that was it. Why am I torturing myself? He doesn't want to be with me. Why can't I just give him his space and let go? But, it's so hard. WORDS OF ADVICE, PLEASE ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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