Been having these nightmares that make me think about her all day.

[TopFive]

I've never stopped thinking about her and what happened, but lately I've been having these really bad dreams about her, her bf and her mother. I'm waaaaaaaaayyyyyy better than I was some months ago, but it still hurts sometimes when i think about how fast she moved on and how cold she was to me. Anyway, those damn dreams are a trip. It's usually about me fighting her bf, her telling me how shes in love with him or me seeing them have sex. I've been tortured the past five months and a lot of it is self inflicted. I really wish i wasn't an obsessive thinker. Do any of you know of any self help stuff that may help me?

 

On another note, I've been healing fine. I look back and I can honestly tell you guys that the reason my healing has been so hard is because of my location. I took a football scholarship from a very small school in the middle of nowhere and I am faaaaaaaaaaaaaarrr away from my home in NJ. When there's nothing to do, no females to screw, all a fella can do is think about the last girl who had his heart. Luckily, this is my last semester here and i'm going home next month! Hopefully, after i come up off some unwanted weight, refine my wardrobe and date a few pretty Jersey girls I'll be able to let go of her. As for now, i'll just finish up my degree here in OK and try to go more than an hour without thinking about the whole situation.

 

Damn I cannot wait for the day that I am completely indifferent to my ex.

[JA0371]

Read Obsessive Love by Susan Forward. Sometimes we obsess about things simply because we can't have them, or by rejection.

[FreeFallFeelin]

The conscious mind is guarded and puts up defenses for us during the day so we can function and take care of living. But when you sleep, your emotional state and issues are free to take over, as your mind still sees the separation as a trauma, as an emergency. Dreams are your subconscious trying to make sense of the loss. Those dreams are graphic because they reflect your truest fears and deepest feelings (anger, betrayal). This is proof that a person can't just decide to not deal with the healing process. You're attitude of moving forward is good T5. Just give yourself time to get over it completely. These long lasting strong feelings show us how powerful our desire to be loved is and how precious it is when we find it or lose it. It's a hard way to learn a valuable lesson.

[TopFive]

The conscious mind is guarded and puts up defenses for us during the day so we can function and take care of living. But when you sleep, your emotional state and issues are free to take over, as your mind still sees the separation as a trauma, as an emergency. Dreams are your subconscious trying to make sense of the loss. Those dreams are graphic because they reflect your truest fears and deepest feelings (anger, betrayal). This is proof that a person can't just decide to not deal with the healing process. You're attitude of moving forward is good T5. Just give yourself time to get over it completely. These long lasting strong feelings show us how powerful our desire to be loved is and how precious it is when we find it or lose it. It's a hard way to learn a valuable lesson.

 

makes sense. I just wish the dreams would stop, theyre terrible.