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Listen up!

Dinocaz

By Dinocaz
in Healing After Break Up or Divorce

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Dinocaz Contributor

Dinocaz

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Hello EnA'ers its been a while since I last posted here, I do though check in from time to time. I felt I had to take a full step back from the world of Online forums dealing with the break up bulls@@Te to concentrate on Self. Well the journey has been ongoing. Broke up Jan this year. Things went from bad to worse. Its in my story in some other post I wrote here yonks ago. But guess what .... in less than a year I can say that I am now almost 99% over the garbage that I had to go through.

 

GONE IS THE PAIN

GONE IS THE GUILT

GONE IS THE FEELING LOSS

GONE IS THE ONLINE STALKING

GONE IS DESPERATE NEED TO CONTACT (HA HA I COULD THINK OF NOTHING WORSE AND ITS NOT EVEN A STRUGGLE NOW IT "JUST IS"

 

In fact if my ex walked in now and I would simply tell her to efff off and mind her own biz. I lost the lot, and the plot. Home , work, self esteem, even at this time my step daughter. But these days i have the attitude of "BRING IT ON" I refused at one point early this year to go down for the count. I got active in my own recovery. I decided I was going to become obsessed with 1 person only .... ME

 

No contact no contact .... boy how much are those 2 words used but for very good reason. stripped away ALL contact. Changed my mobile number, blocked everything within 3000 miles on any and every social network, I stopped ALL communication. Not even death would get me to change that. I was ruthless with my attitude on this. There was and *never will be ... any reason on gods fine planet to break contact.

 

And while I was swimming in a ocean of self pity I was at the same time pushing myself to my very limits to break my attatchment to the past. When A thought of the ex came to me I shoved it away as if it was poisen. And I still do. I FORBID my family members in ever mentioning the past or my ex again. They know now not to say a word and never do.

 

I am going through total re-invention of self. I am p@sss pot broke, cant hardly pay my way but im working fighting and movng forward in great big steps. What Im saying is NO MATTER How toxic or cronic it gets or is right now and yeah I know many of you are really really hurting right now, NO matter how bad it is you need to get active in your own recovery. Make it YOUR Misson. Embrace the pain and loss as if it is your best friend and use to propell yourself forward in ways you could never imagine.

 

The BEST thing now that I feel ever happened to me was seeing my ex run to someone else and smash everything I thought was true and forever as that is the foundations of my new life. Im going to be filthy rich again at some point in the next 2 years. Arrogant ? Maybe but I care not, I feel it I know it ... even though I type this sat in rags.

 

Im excited about the future - and want YOU yes YOU reading this to feel the same. Come on and fight and understand that it can be done, and you can not only heal but can become the person you NEVER could be with your ex. Be happy they are gone and embrace the future.

 

Onwards ENA-ers

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spd19 Rookie

spd19

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Hey Dinocaz! what a positive post. It actually makes me feel happy and with hope to the future! I had my heartbroken 3 months ago and everyday is different. I'm looking forward to feel indifference towards my ex.

 

I'm glad you feel that way! All the best! and hopefully ill be feeling the same soon

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Dinocaz Contributor

Dinocaz

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This was a pleasure to read and gives me hope.

I'm doing well considering my circumstances, and i just hope this time next year i will be as positive as you are.

 

I love the tips of changing number etc. Maybe i'll give it a try myself.

 

Thanks,

Limiya

 

Hi Limiya DO IT! Why keep any hold on the past. Do everything you can for yourself if you are sure it is over, which in most cases it usually is. I hung on with "hope" for a while but knew it was pointless. Ask yourself this what have you got to loose ? Life dont get any worse when someone you love kicks you the "b@@@llss" so any change you do for self has to be a good thing don't it ?

 

Wish you well really Do!

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Limiya Enthusiast

Limiya

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Thanks Dinocaz.

I have done well so far. I have removed all text messages, deleted his phone number (i don't have it memorized), removed mutual friends off Facebook.. etc.

I am also still continuing with all my hobbies outside of work. Things like my Dancing, Teaching Dance, and i've signed up to new projects which start in October which will keep me busy on evenings after work.

The more i just 'get on with it' the better.

I know i'll get there.

 

Limiya

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Dinocaz Contributor

Dinocaz

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I salute you Dinocaz! Such an uplifting post. I hope to move on completely like you did very soon.

 

I suppose this means you won't take back your ex just in case she comes crawling back?

 

Thanks!

 

And in answer to your question NEVER EVER NEVER! She could not say or do anything that would or can hurt me further. And if she came crawling on her belly I would simply turn my back on her. This I know to my very core. The person I was back then no longer exsists. Its that simple.

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Dinocaz Contributor

Dinocaz

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Thanks Dinocaz.

I have done well so far. I have removed all text messages, deleted his phone number (i don't have it memorized), removed mutual friends off Facebook.. etc.

I am also still continuing with all my hobbies outside of work. Things like my Dancing, Teaching Dance, and i've signed up to new projects which start in October which will keep me busy on evenings after work.

The more i just 'get on with it' the better.

I know i'll get there.

 

Limiya

 

With your attitude and mindset you can not fail. It is impossible. There will only be one outcome in your struggle - you standing tall and striding forward. Keep at it!

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Dinocaz Contributor

Dinocaz

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Thanks for posting this. My ex ended it horribly 4 months ago and after giving me hope, he fled and hasnt contacted me since. Still heartbroken, we had planned to move into a house 3 days after he did all this

 

Will he get back in touch? ever?

 

Hi I honestly dont know if your ex will get back in touch. But more to the point why waste energy on wondering ? its a horrible feeling I know but the longer it goes the less likely it will be. Acceptance is hard that what has ended will remain so but its an important step to getting your life back. Do you really want to waste another 4 months wondering and waiting ? or spend that time healing ?

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