So, what does this message mean? Ex contacts me after almost 2 months of BU

[Lionator]

It's been 2 month since the BU, we've had to have minimal contact because we work together and last night she sends me this. Please note she was the one that initiated the breakup.

 

"I hope one day I get the opportunity to thank you for everything our relationship has taught me"

 

thoughts? Should I respond?

Any advice would be helpful at this point.

[Ms Darcy]

That doesn't mean anything. You sound like you still want to get back together?

[leftme]

Sounds like a cack handed complement so I'd just ignore.

 

Personally I'd cheekily reply "fancy learning some more?" but that's just me being silly.

[Lionator]

I don't want to get back together, I know the relationship was not progressive and she was a saprophytic organism (me being a little kid-ish) but, I was just wondering if there seems to be some ulterior motive here.

 

We still have to see each other due to work and I don't know if I should reply or not. I might do a simple reply...but nothing more than that.

[Ms Darcy]

Well I wouldn't worry about it because we'll never really know if she just wants to be friendly or wants more.

[Lionator]

well, I responded because I'm just that way.

 

I said "What do you mean?"

 

she said, "I just have learned more with you than I have with anyone else, both good and bad, and I wouldn't be where I am otherwise. I'm sorry I can't tell you these things in person, it doesn't even matter now but man you just helped me grow..."

 

Me: "I'm happy for you then"

 

Her "I hope you're doing well...I guess it hit me that you and I will never be friends and I don't foresee any reason you and I would ever talk, that's all on me, but again, doesn't matter. I can only hope someday I find someone that can make me feel the way I did and make me just, better."[/b]

 

me: "I hope the best for you. I'm glad I gave you something that helped you on your path"

[markie6]

Well before you posted your reply, I would have said it was just a thankyou and bye bye... without saying it. Possibly feeling a little nostalgic , a little down and wanted to guage what you were thinking about maybe, people don't often start dialogue... with no motive...

 

Maybe she felt a little guilty, sadly we cannot mind read. Even cold emotionless text can be diffeicult to decypher, best not to reply... if the messages keep coming when you don't reply, it often points to confusion ad what you don't want is more of that

[Tom1990]

I'm guessing she doesn't know what she wants, so she's just throwing stuff out there. She's definitely not over you; otherwise she wouldn't have bothered. I don't think you did any harm with that conversation, especially since you kept your own needs protected. Well done.

[nattpanter]

I guess silence was her answer? I have had my ex doing the same to me...

 

ps. She is not over you, but you should not chase her. Chase your future and let her marinate in her nostaligia!

[MasterPo]

I read it as someone lonely and reflective. She figured it cost nothing to toss out a few ego stroking words and you responded. She's probably hopeful and now she will give it time to fester and come back at you in a month or so, if you haven't responded by then.

 

Mean? Nah, just reading what you wrote and it means nothing as we don't know the whole story. Educated guess or SWAG.

[Lionator]

I read it as someone lonely and reflective. She figured it cost nothing to toss out a few ego stroking words and you responded. She's probably hopeful and now she will give it time to fester and come back at you in a month or so, if you haven't responded by then.

 

Mean? Nah, just reading what you wrote and it means nothing as we don't know the whole story. Educated guess or SWAG.

 

I guess we'll see. I'm not really waiting for a reply my life is going by pretty fast--it has been busy

 

The weird thing is she contacted me right on the 8th week mark.

 

Oh well...

[gtnovru]

I agree with another post - I think she's just being reflective. She's happy with her life now, and she's just thanking you as a person.

 

I'm glad you don't want her back - because the words she used... to me... says she's over the relationship, and that might've stung if you still wanted her.

 

My ex texted me this week asking how I'm doing. After reading this thread, I'm realizing you CANNOT read too much into anything. Just because they reach out again, doesn't mean they want to get back together. Furthermore, if they're confused... the last thing you wanna do is put your heart out again... to someone who might change their mind and hurt you again.

 

We have to self-protect.

[John3572]

You should've have responded. She only texted you to figure out what you were thinking.