How to make this work?

[Reminiscence]

I've been seeing this guy for a few months and we've hit a few road bumps. He has told me that we don't have good conversations because he doesn't think I listen, just agree with everything he says, and I don't initiate conversations. He believes this is because we don't have the same interests in life so we won't know what to talk about. He enjoys reading and I enjoy video games.

 

I don't agree with what he says because I'm a quiet person and not much of a talker. As for the interests part...we've never gone on any dates because we don't have time what with school and work. We still try and make time to see each other even if it's for a short time. Also, we've never established that we were gf/bf or dating so I kinda held back because I didn't want to assume we were...if that makes any sense.

 

We've talked about this but we just can't figure out what to do. Any suggestions?

[tallydoo]

Have you guys talked about what you are to each other? And why don't you try and set up an actual date--surely you can find one night that would work? That way, you guys might find some common interests, and you guys will get to know each other better and in a different context.

[delicous]

It sounds like he feels like you all need to be friends first. If he is saying all of these things about possibly not being "compatible" or having enough chemistry, i'd say to step back a few steps, and talk like friends do, you can still be flirty and yourself, but just talk as friends and think of him as just that ....For now, see how he reacts. I would drop texting all together. If there is any advise I can give, it'd be that. The other thing, when you are talking with him, be yourself completely, down to the very thought in your head, treat him like a close girlfriend of yours, share a story about your day, good or bad!... On the other hand, if you honestly are not interested in what he is interested in,you guys might just need to work a little harder, but do what makes you happy. Don't ever settle for 2nd best! In the end, when it all boils down, it's your life and you should use every second of it for YOU!