It's official! I'm not moving out! (lots of work still to do)

[nbr]

She confirmed it this evening.

No, not everything is forgiven, and no I can't go back to the old me (why would I want to), but we were talking about our anniversary today a bit and when I got home I told her how she made today the best day I've had in a very long time. She was honestly confused and I told her that she was talking about us going to a B&B for our anniversary (yah, so?) and how that means she's planning on me not moving out.

She asked me if I really thought I was going to be kicked to the curb, and I said I really didn't know, since she hadn't told me directly. Yes she had hinted, but as far as I knew I was still holding my breath for two weeks from now when her commitment to the two months of therapy was up and she was to decide if I've done enough to prove I can actually change and am committed to fixing all the stuff.

 

She said I was being silly, and that yes, I was obviously working so hard at it that she couldn't kick me out.

 

happy, happy, happy, haaaaaaaaaappy!!!

 

I need to thank sooo many people here for the encouragement, the harsh dishing of reality, the tempering of expectations, the support.

Even those of you who I thought were a little mean contributed to this.

 

I don't really know you all, and yet I owe you so much. I hope I can help others, and I plan on continuing to improve myself (hope you don't mind me asking for advice now and then ).

 

Hugs to everyone (except the guys that aren't comfortable with that, we'll go with fist bumps).

-nbr

[radioteque]

Cheers, mate. Hopefully things keep looking up from now on

[nbr]

I'm high as a kite right now.

So much uncertainty (and hence anxiety) just melting away.

Now to keep up the new me and forever keep improving.

-nbr

[Berglynt]

Congrats. Good news is always welcomed. Keep up what you are doing.

[nbr]

Congrats. Good news is always welcomed. Keep up what you are doing.

Thanks, and I plan on it. The hardest part is trying to not smother her (that nonchalance is your friend thread is helpful here

I plan on hanging out on the boards (god knows I need advice still) and a month or so in I'll write up a post on what happened and how things are going.

I've seen a couple other threads of people getting back together in the last two days, so there must be something in the air

-nbr

[TalkThatTalk9]

aww... congratulations sir!

 

Good job at being patient, working hard, and seeing results from it! You have taught me patience goes a long way...

 

Keep it up!!!! This is a good sign. I hope it keeps going well for you guys. Don't push talking about the relationship too much, just let things happen. be chill, laid back, and keep up what you are doing

[nbr]

We had a small bump last night, I think it was her testing the waters (about my regulating my emotional response to things). She teased me a bit about dating, and I tried to run with the joke (started with me being a good room mate and that she like me more than her husband [old me]). I asked her if she wanted to be more than room mates and leave her husband (new start on us and all) and she said she wanted her room mate to hook her up with a friend...

 

Well, I think I handled it ok. I went silent for a few seconds while I processed it and thought about various responses, and decided to go with "I don't get it".

she giggled and said she was teasing me. (Not nice, not nice). Given our history and that I was the actual cheat, I chalk it up to some payback. She liked the full body rub with this vanilla body butter I gave her, so I think it was just a little test. And I think I passed.

 

On a separate front we talked about where I still need to do more work, but she said she was chalking that up to me being busy and forgetful, not lazy, and so it was not a big deal (cleaning up after myself, I'm better at it, but not perfect). She called out all the stuff I've been doing right and how that matters more than not clearing the dishes right away, or picking up a screwdriver that I've been using (Especially since the screwdriver is from me working on projects for her

 

Like I said, lots of work still to do, but I am so happy that I'm apparently staying home, I'd walk to the moon and back for her.

 

Oh, and *Italy*, 1.46 years from now, a proper honeymoon.

-nbr