Doesn't Call me until she thinks I'm Gone!

[skynet74]

My ex and I broke up the last time in May. 5 Months goes by and she treats me like garbage. Doesn't want to talk to me or even to maintain a friendship like she told me she wanted. During our last conversation I told her I was moving to California (3,000 Miles away). She didn't care. She didn't even want to see me before I left. I asked her if she wanted to get together before I go. Her response was....... "WHY"?

 

Yes..... that was extremely hurtful and Rude. Unfortunately after 10 years together, that is what she has become. Just a mean person.

This brings me to today. The Ex thinks I'm gone. In all reality I'm still in the area for now. But she doesn't need to know that. My Cell Phone rings and it's HER Number calling. I found this very odd. She could not get far enough away from me during the last 5 months. She didn't even want to hear from me anymore. She just wanted to keep pushing me away until I was totally gone. Well she did that. Now today she called. My question is..... WHY?

 

I didn't answer. I did not want to tell her where I am and I also did not want to be available to her. She has not been there for me at All for months and months. Why should I give her the satisfaction of answering her calls NOW? I am just wondering why she would even call me at all. Is this a case of not missing me until she thinks I'm gone? Perhaps she was just curious if I actually left. Who knows>? I just know that 10 days ago she didn't even want to see me one last time. She Didn't want to talk to me or anything. She even changed her cell phone number so I wouldn't call. Now today she's calling me. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?

 

 

 

John

[aireyc]

Hey John, I can't really offer any help to you here, but I remember reading of someone else on these forums who accidentally called their ex even though they didn't mean to. I'm not saying this is the case, but maybe she didn't mean to call you. If she calls again, then I would be a little more suspicious.

 

Chris

[skynet74]

Well she called from work. No speed dial. She called my cell phone. Definitely an intentional call. Just don't know why.

 

 

John

[aireyc]

Oh, well if that's the case, she probably had some epiphany. Considering what you said, it would seem to me as if her plans failed and you, who might be considered a fallback in her eyes, also left her. It sounds to me as if you never really wanted to end the relationship; it was more her actions that distanced you two. If that is what happened, she probably did feel that you were always there if she became desperate. You mentioned you asked if she wanted to meet up before you left, and this would send her signals that you still have some feelings for her. Once she realizes what actually happened, she may have seen it as a mistake and wants to see if you actually did move.

 

I could be totally off base and it may be something very minute, but if I had to pick what I think happened, I basically stated it above.

 

Chris

[Leslii]

John,

To be honest with you, I bet she had met someone else. I am also pretty sure she was really into him. That is why she was so angry and so sure

she wanted nothing to do with you. Guess what?? The new guy dumped her and now she is feeling stupid, vulnerable,alone, rejected. You get the picture. She needs something to take away those feelings and what easier

way than with someone who wants to see her and be with her. You can

take some that sting away that she is feeling. He didn't want her but she knows you do. She made a mistake and it didn't work out, so now you are good enough again. I am sure if she wasn't dumped she wouldn't be trying to get your attention. She also knows you have caller ID on your

phone. She is trying to get you to call her back because she is to gutless

and embarrased to to leave a message. If I were you I wouldn't give her

the time of day.

I have seen many people over the years fall into traps. They break up with someone and when the new relationship doesn't work the old is good enough because they need somebody. When I was younger and insecure

I behaved this way too. I dumped a boyfriend for a guy that I was absolutley crazy for. After about 2 weeks the new guy dumped me and guess what I did? I tried to get back with my old boyfriend. I was feeling

so much pain I thought the comfort of my old boyfriend would take it all away. He never did take me back though, thank goodness.

Don't settle for 2nd best.

Lesley

[chai714]

John,

It doesn't matter why she called. You could sit there and speculate for days, and ask every single person in the world. The bottom line is ...that she called you. It's obvious this chick doesn't give a damn about you anymore. She's come in and out, caused you irreversible pain, etc. Don't let her back in your life. I can't say don't call her, cause I think you'll cave in and do it. But I say don't do it. There are too many level headed females out there who won't string you along. Come to Cali . . we've got millions.

[Leslii]

An ex can be a great rebound. Don't allow yourself to be her rebound.