Jump to content

Leslii

Members
 View Profile  See their activity

  • Posts

    52

  • Joined

 Content Type 

Everything posted by Leslii

  1. Leslii
    If you are too scared to kick him out then you have no business being with him. You are afraid of him. You only live once. I know you don't want to leave your house but he needs to get forced out. Get a restraining order. Also tell the judge you are worried he may come back. Change all the locks. Lock your windows and put in an alarm system. Get a roomate. Or maybe you could go stay with someone for a while until things cool down. He will drag you down with him. Misery loves company! You sound like you have had enough, so end this dysfuctional cycle now and move on with your life. You only live once. Enjoy it instead of wasting it.
  2. Leslii
    She left you for anther guy and you took her back when it didn't work??? You need to think about this long and hard!!! So you are back together and what she did is painful but only time will dull the pain. Lots of time. It something that you can't force yourself to get over. Heartache can linger for a long time. If she does pull another stunt like this again, don't take her back.
  3. Leslii
    He is dominant and wants you to be submisssive- I hope you are NOT!!! This guy is a total jerk. Something is not right with him. It is time for you to move on, even if it hurts. You can't be a puppet for some OLD DOMINATING JERK who lives 4 states away. Who does he think he is disappearing and reappearing when he feels like it. But you are allowing it even if you don't like it. Stop this dysfunctional relationship and move on. Why does he do it??? First of all because he can. Or maybe he wants to see you beg for him. Maybe he needed space. Or another woman and when it didn't work out he knew you would be there so here he comes again. But whatever the reason he should be respectful enough to let you know. Don't allow him to walk in and out of your life when he pleases, this is your life not his. You need to get some guts and stand up to this guy.
  4. Leslii
    Dragonslayer, Hide your money!!! Don't put it in your account. If they used it to pay bills that is one thing but if they use it for thier own enjoyment then that is weird. 3 more years honey.
  5. Leslii
    DragonslayerX I don't know if you will ever seek help, but I hope you do. Your messages are heartbreaking. You need to deal with this situation. But you are 15 , can you survive 3 more years? Please hang on!!! Life is enjoyable. You may not believe it now but it can be and it will be. When you can surround yourself with good people, life will be much better. You will appreciate kindness and hopefully you can be a loving,kind,nice great man. I still hope you talk to a counselor maybe something can be done. Please take care ok!!!!! You are better than them, remember that. You can prove that someday. I will pray for you.
  6. Leslii
    just because they are your parents doesn't mean they are good people. It is thier job to povide for you. Some people do not make good parents. In fact yours sound terrible- they beat you!!! There are alot of lousy parents out there and you got stuck. I feel so bad for you. You sound so unhappy and misersable. Why don't you talk to a counselor and see if foster care is an option for you. You can't live with people that beat you and make you feel like you want to die. Parents are suppose to make you feel safe. Go talk to a counselor you need someone to help you deal with them. Good Luck
  7. Leslii
    I am sure you are grieving for your ex. You wouldn't grieve about being alone and uncertain about your future. You may have had a bad relationship but you can still feel tremendous pain when it is over. You get used to a person in your life and when that person is gone it can be such a shock. So I am sure that it is her that you miss or your the life that you knew with her, because now your life is different. You may want to be in a relationship at sometime but I don't think that is something that you would grieve about. We grieve over people we have lost.
  8. Leslii
    You are only 20, why so desperate at a young age? Do you NEED to be married.? You have the "anybody is better than nobody" syndrome. SAD!!!! You could learn to love someone,if you talked yourself into it. But I guarantee that it is alot easier to hate someone than to love someone. You asked for thoughts on it..... it is gross, disgusting and inhumane. I also see it as emotionally abusive and controlling. YUCK!!!!!
  9. Leslii
    It seems like you need someone a little more mature than what you have now. It is really hard to "change" men. They change when they want to-if ever. He sounds a insensitive and impulsive. Who says you have to be in debt your whole life. He is making excuses for outrageous spending. You point things out to him and he doesn't respond to your feelings. You can try talking to him but you are both very young. It is your job to make your life happy, not his. A man can bring you joy but you can't expect him to make you happy. That is our job. But if he is making you unhappy I suggest that you should rethink this relationship. Don't settle for something below your standards. Be picky and pick wisely.
  10. Leslii
    You told him you needed space, we all know what that means. So you were being somewhat honest. Being with someone for 2 years is a long time at your age. One of the greatest things about your college years is the new people you meet. This is the time in your life when you are changing and you are beginning to find out the real you. Don't limit yourself to one guy- you'll regret it. For some that is fine but in your case I think you need to go out and explore a little. You are too young too be tied down and you obviously feel it. You just feel guilty for hurting your boyfriend. But ,better now than later. Who knows maybe he would have called one day and said he "needed space".
  11. Leslii
    If she has put you through all that why would you want to put your own children in her misery. Just because she is your mother it doesn't give her the right to emotionally abuse you. She is a very ill woman. She wants to drag you down with her. Misery loves company!!!! Don't fall into her trap. You may also want to get counseling.If she has been like this for years you may have some emotional scars that need healing. I can't imagine what you have been through. You need to cut the cord. Get away from her. Get your children away from her. She doesn't need to drag them through her life of destruction. She has already done it to you. It is time for this to end.
  12. Leslii
    She sounds like an idiot. Who cares if she was with him first. Does she think that matters. You are with him now. She is in competiton with you for some reason. Jealousy I am sure. Good Luck!!
  13. Leslii
    idon'tgetit, What you say sounds ideal but to me the world doesn't work that way. It is obvious that it doesn't work that way for most people. Just look around. It would be nice to grow and change together. But when we do grow or change what we want in a partner changes also. Which usually means a new partner, no partner or many partners. It may hurt but that the way it is. Who and what we find attractive is a mate will not be the same as we get older. The older we get the more sure of what we want and need. We live in a selfish society and if we don't like something we change it, hurting people in the process. The younger you are, more likely you are to behave this way. The older you are the more life experiences you have had so when life throws you some changes you are able to adapt and still keep your partner. Of course this isn't true for everyone. Some younger couples can have a very strong relationship. Some couples who get together at a later stage in life can have a horrible relationship. But we do need to experience different things in life which sometimes means different relationships. When my friends and I look back at our past relationships we can't believe we were attracted to these guys. At the time I thought they were great. But now I wouldn't have any interest in them. They probably feel the same way about me. They were not bad men but we all change and I know I would be very unhappy if I would have chose to settle with one of them. My taste in men is different now. I don't regret past relationships. In fact I see it now as a learning experience. Back then I didn't. We learn and grow from heart-ache. It is not fun, it can be miserable.
  14. Leslii
    idon'tgetit, Why is honesty overrated? Is lying better? I think most people would rather hear the truth unless they live in a world of denial and they convince themselves of thinking something. Honesty doesn't make the pain go away any faster but lying wouldn't either. What should he have told her??? Should he have made something up LIKE MOST MEN DO. What do I consider much older? 30. I wouldn't get married to someone until I was at least 30. That doesn't mean that is for everyone. But all of my friends who married young said they would have waited. Most of my younger friends who married young are now separated or divorced. What you want in a mate or find attractive in a mate changes as you get older!!! Because people change. We are still changing and growing long into adulthood.So then we sometimes want something else in a mate. What we found attractive in a mate before may not be what we want now.
  15. Leslii
    You are in severe denial. You don't need to be face to face for closure. It is obviously over. It has been for along time. When someone says they don't want to see you why would you push it? From the sound of it you would take her back in a second if she wanted you back. She had a man behind your back. She is not a good person. You should want better for yourself. What do you mean she might be pregnant because she was unfaithful???? Do you know that she had unprotected sex? Did she give you these details? I am cofused by this odd statment. If she is pregnant and it is the other mans child you really need to get out of her life and stay away.
  16. Leslii
    Insecurity so unattractive. You need to work on self-esteem issues before you decide to date again. Women are crazy for confident men. You may have blown it with her but work on yourself for a while and then try dating again. Take time so you don't end up with a rebound girlfriend. Dating is a learning experience. The pain won't go away for awhile but accept what has happened and do your best to move on.
  17. Leslii
    At least he was honest. Do you know how many people get dumped and they don't know why. It is usually because the attraction is fading. They never admit this though. They say things like I need space, you are too good for me, we have nothing in common, I am too busy Blah blah blah. If he hasn't had many girlfriends before you he may want the experience of dating. I really recommend that people date different types of people and be much older before they settle down with one partner or this is what happens. Or if you two got married he would end up having an affair or end up leaving you later.What if he left you and you had children together? As much as it hurts it is better that he did it now instead of later. Only time can take your pain away. This is not a reflection on you, I promise. You did nothing wrong. Your self-esteem will come back with time. When we are sad and feeling down our self -esteem goes down hill. Hold your head high because your self worth is very important. Good Luck
  18. Leslii
    Stay out of her way as much as possible. Also, be a better person than her. No matter how childish she acts don't sink to her level. I don't know why she is impossible but show her that you are not impossible and that you are mature. Hopefully she will get over what is bothering her.
  19. Leslii
    Lily04, It is obvious that you are scared to leave him, the more reason to leave him. If he is holding something over your head then he is a scary man. You didn't say he would do this but you suspect it and that could very well happen. So you see it happening. Run girl!!! This guy is bad news. It sounds like you will have a bad break-up but don't let that stop you. The sooner the better, especially if he is gone now. Let him get over it while he is away. His anger won't be so strong when he gets back because he will have had a little time to deal with it. I know you didn't ask for a follow up but I just wanted to say a couple of things. Oh yeah and if you have to get legal help for your pictures then do it. If you can't get them back it still better than being with him. The controversy will go away and your pictures will end up being old news. Good Luck
  20. Leslii
    She may not want you but she doesn't want anyone else to have you either. That is why she keeps you at arms length. I have done this before and so have many people I know. It is something you admit later in life. It is very obvious she wants to date others and you. She is only 20. way too young for a commitement. More than likely she has dated others and when things don't go so well then you are good enough. It may sound harsh but that is the way it works. you need to back off her and let her breathe even if she comes to you. She is playing you and you are falling right into it. Are you going to allow her to see you when she feels like it or when the "others" don't work out. Don't be so easy! How unattractive is that. Stand up for yourself and to her. She is not ready or sure that you are the one. You know she is the one for you but her actions say that you are not the one for her. Not yet anyway. You need more control in this situation. I don't mean be controlling but get a back-bone and don't allow yourself to be treated this way even if it hurts to give her up. You deserve better.
  21. Leslii
    It is so obvious that you are not ready to live with someone new. You said you don't want to wait 4 years to see if it will work. But that is what you need to do. It has only been a year sinse your break-up. You are acting very needy and insecure. The more reason not to do this. If your break-up was so hard why are you not letting yourself heal??? Because you are in your 30's. If you do this you will be single in your 40's. I can hear the pain in your message for your ex. I believe you will try to convince yourself that this relationship is right. Don't be in denial it will haunt you later. Finding someone so soon after a long and serious realtionship doesn't sound very healthy. As for telling your ex about your new plans, why do you feel the need to tell her. She is your ex, right? unless you have kids involved and you are truly over it is not anyones best interest to talking about your palns with your new girlfriend. It also sounds like you two are better off not being "friends". Being friends with your ex is overrated and usually stupid. There is no need unless there is a connection that you can't quite give up. Cut the cord!!! Move on with your new life. Good Luck
  22. Leslii
    SD4, Cassiana was not not being critical. you she gave you some advise. It is obvious you need it. She told you to slow down because being engaged at age 16 is not normal. In fact it is insane. Yes, you do say you realize your mistakes but I think you need to stay away from girls for a while. You need to work on self-esteem issues. You already are amazed that some "popular" girl is giving you the time of day. That is so sad that you feel like this. You don't need a date to go to a party. Go by yourself and then do your "drinking game" when you see her there. Do you think she will find you attractive with your head in the toliet or so sloppy drunk that you say really dumb things that you will regret in the morning. NO!!! Exessive drinking shows a sign of weakness, not strength. I know this was not the advise you asked for but this is what you need. Work on yourself for a while. You will be much happier. You don't need a girl to make you happy. Relationships are wonderful but for you-NOT YET!!!
  23. Leslii
    AmikeA, People who are possesive don't see it !! Also what she calls possesive and you call possesive could be two different things. I would ask her though. Just tell her that you heard through the grapevine she is telling people that you are possesive and you want to know in what way. If she does give you legitimate reasons and that you can see her point, tell her "thank you" for letting you know so you can work on this in future relationships. Don't tell her you will change for her though. She needs to feel that you are not using this as an excuse to win her back and you are moving on with your life without her. That is a very attractive quality!!!! Dating is a learning experience. You will look back someday and see your mistakes but sometimes they need to be pointed out to us on occasion. That is why marrying at a young age is foolish. People need to date a variety of people. It also helps us pick up clues early on in a relationship of what is wrong or right. Now on the other hand she could be making this up. Maybe she is uncomfortable telling people the real reason for the break-up. So i think you should ask her because you seem very upset over this and you do deserve to know.
  24. Leslii
    Nothing can make your pain go away except time. It does take time. When she does talk to you try not to act so angry by telling her to "go talk to your boyfriend". Act as nice and friendly as possible. It will drive her crazy, I promise. just pretend that you are glad it is over. I know it sounds like a childish game-well it is, but don't act hurt to her face. She would rather have you missing her than not missing her even if she has no plans of ever getting back with you. So act like you don't miss her, even though you do. So try not to be mopey around her. Be as happy as possible around her it will have her wondering what is up. This has worked many times by many people and the ex's quite often come running back. I am not sure if you should take her back, but by the sound of it you would have her back in a second if you could so this is your best shot. Other than that only time can heal your pain. Dating would also be helpful but when you are so emotionally vulnerable nothing serious would be a good idea right now. Take Care!! You will get through this even though it feels like you won't.
  25. Leslii
    Cassie, If it has only been a few weeks this is not good. A person who wants a relationship so quickly is usually very insecure. It should be even more alarming that you have discussed this with him and he is not responding to your concerns. I have been around a long time and have dated many men. It is in my experience that men who want a relationship very quickly usually end up being controlling. I have friends who say the same thing. Being too pushy should be a red flag for you and I know you see it so please be careful. He is probably very emotionally needy and will try to make you feel guilty when you want to call it quits. There is no reason you can't break-up with him over the phone. It has only been a few weeks. It is not cheesy at all. It is not like you have a long history together or anything. A phone call is more than appropriate. It will get the job done just as well as driving 2 hours to do it????
×
×
  • Create New...