I broke NC and now i am even more confused

[Blondie176]

*hugs* No i certainly wouldnt wish this on anyone, the pain, the silence, i have cried so hard i couldnt breath, at one point i was losing it so badly i was rocking bath and forth like some mental patient, i swear this is hell.

 

You have done incredibly well though, to still be feeling like you do but to have not contacted him, wow, you deserve a pat on the back for that.

 

Has he attempted contact at all in the past 6 months?

 

For me this is pretty standard post break up, i get so attached, i give myself 100% so when it all comes falling down i take forever to get over it. I annoy myself with it so lord knows what people around me think, thank god for places like this! I'm 36 with a failed marriage behind me, there i was thinking thats it for me, i am alone forever, i then meet him, everything i want in a man and more... and now that is a pile of horse * * * * e too...

 

Want to come join a convent with me? lol.. xxx

[Blondie176]

I have noticed the word censorship on this forum is very on the ball..i have tried to write the word S h i t twice now with two different spellings... both have been censored LOL I will try to avoid swearing from now on.

[pippy longstocking]

oh am I there sister blondie haha ...they wouldn't take us ..we would be in naughty nun corner

 

oh you did make me laugh with the rocking ...oh my god are you me ..yep ..with you on that as well ..

 

in the early days I went to my corner shop and the shopkeeper said as normal "hi , how are you"

 

omg I broke all over his counter

 

he's gone I said ..my boyfriend has left me ..there was snot and everything ..poor bloke just stood

there wide eyed hahahahahahah

 

anyway , a couple of days later I had to ring sky and broke down on the phone and kept him on the phone for 35 minutes ...haha

 

but bless him he gave me the number of the samaritans ...oh god what do we do to ourselves.

 

 

no he hasnt made contact ..I have been close , but like I say I have burst on here and asked to be talked out of it ..

 

sorry you have the marriage behind you as well ..it does affect you when your getting older doesn't it . My bezzy is 46 and we say we are hurlting towards 50 at boob dropping speed and we thought we would be settled by now ...her life is a bag of crap as well ...bah hahaha

[Blondie176]

Oh dear lol.

 

Ok todays good news..i won £10 on the lotto YAY

 

Havent heard a peep out of HIM, i am sort of angry with him for all the BS on Friday and then nothing, obviously this means he was lying his backside off when he said he still loves me. I am up and down in my mind, one second i am full of '' Sod him. i can do better'' then i am '' Oh god i need him, i cant breath without him'' I havent cried today though- yet LOL

 

xxx

[pippy longstocking]

hey that's fab

 

hope your still hanging in there blondie ...it is up and down , you will get there

 

thinking of you xx

[Blondie176]

Great picture SS xxx

 

Inn--gggerr---lannnndddd ....Inn-gerrrr-landdddd ..We're not goingggggggggg homeeee.. WooHoo!

 

*Ahem* Ok so obviously i am happy England won tonight, bitter sweet though cause usually i chew HIS ear off with question after question about this and that during a game, i watched alone with the occasional appearance from my daughter checking id hadnt had a heart attack!

 

I am up and down really, i feel sad that i have lost him, i keep having moments of shear panic wondering what happens to me now, without him, scared crapless he will forget me completely.

IDK ..

 

 

 

Hope you are well xxxxx

[Blondie176]

Oh god! Can someone please get it into my thick skull that contacting him would be a bad idea?

 

I feel like a drug addict craving her fix of cocaine or something, 5 days since he told me he still loved me..yet where the hell is he? With her, thats where!

 

I wish someone could get a hold of one of those memory erasers from Men In Black..pleasee erase my memory of HIM.

 

xxx

[Blondie176]

Lord knows why i posted this thread in ''Getting back together'' as if.. thats me wishful thinking, i guess. Feel free to move it into the dealing with the 'heart wrenching crap after a break up' section. xxx

[Clueless90]

Lord knows why i posted this thread in ''Getting back together'' as if.. thats me wishful thinking, i guess. Feel free to move it into the dealing with the 'heart wrenching crap after a break up' section. xxx

 

I am going through NC at the moment, my first day actually with the guy I want to be with but we gotta give ourselves a break, we can't expect to suddenly feel better that's why you set your self small goals such as go one day without NC then make it a little bit longer and longer until at some point you're able to go a day without thinking about him and stressing about what he is doing. As someone previously said in this thread his actions speak volumes and if he wanted to work things out he would leave that other girl and stop jerking you around. He is a weak minded person. You can't expect to go from crazy about someone to nothing over night, its impossible unless your feelings were never that real. That is why you need little goals and take it day by day, step by step. You also need to project all this energy you're putting on him back onto yourself. Go on Youtube and watch 'Ashley Kay' videos. I found them immensely helpful. Also you constantly ringing him etc and telling him all of your feelings gives him the cool confidence to walk away and pursue other girls whilst knowing that he will be able to pick you up right where he left you. He probably feels pretty good having two people who want him and I hate to say it but you're making yourself hes safety net. You do not want that if you want him back but to be honest he sounds like a DOUCHE.

 

Please you need to stop waiting around for him and as I said set little goals and when you're tempted then try to distract yourself by doing something, delete his number, lose his email, cut him off from social networking sites or post here this forum or better yet make a list of all the reasons you shouldn't call him. Be strong. You can do it.