Its only getting harder after 2 months of this breakup !!!

[1TAKENi]

I don’t know how long I can take this anymore. I’m so irritable and pissy after the breakup. It was amazing in the beginning and we were both very happy and it was LOVE! Of course there are always downfalls in a relationship. I was immature and would argue or Id be jealous and controlling at times, and he had his annoying behavior too We got into stupid arguments and things got worse after good times for no reason. We got home and things got worse after a few months. Of course, he got tired and said he wanted out of the relationship. I didn’t really think he meant it. But we stayed together until it got the worst it good get. I finally left after he told me to leave and after all the arguing and fighting. But before I left I decided I still wanted to remain friends with him. We hung after that and acted like we were still dating. Only I still had feelings while his weren’t as strong. It started turing into a pattern. I would talk to him on the phone, Id get upset and want him back. We would argue because he didn’t want the same thing and then I would just stay and keep my faith. Id go for a period without talking to him and then we would miss each other and Id think maybe things could change, but they don’t we just talk and flirt and then the pattern goes on and on. And then my hatred and anger just bottles down inside and then I get really upset because my patience runs short. I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel so lost, confused, angry, irritable, and ashamed.He doesn’t even take me seriously when I tell him how I feel. He never has anything positive to say. The ONLY thing he does say is IM SORRY or I NEVER WANTED TO HURT YOU. Im so angry because I know I still love him. Im so angry because I am smarter than this but im only hurting myself and lowering myself. Im so angry because things shouldn’t have ended this way. I think about all the good times we had and then I miss him more. What bothers me the most is that in spite of what happened, why we broke up or vise versa I think that no matter what happened If he loved me he would be back with me by now. But he obviously doesn’t. He has gotten over this break up of two months. He even told me. I get so angry because to me it looks like he hasent even been affected by it a bit. He continues with his life. Hangs out with his friends and does whatever the heck he wants like he hasent ever dated me before. Im so ashamed because I wish I would have started my relationship the right way , because it could still be in progress right now id I would’ve been good from the start. I want another chance to make it right but he says it will only take time.He tries to be nice and sugar coat things and talk to me all nice and calls me the nice name he used to call me when we were dating. Im afraid I might forget him. And to him it doesn’t seem to matter anymore about us ever getting back as of now, and that hurts a lot! I cant do this anymore its only hurting me I might have messed up in the past but if he cant take my real word now he sure does not love me, and I cant just stay around for something that’s never going to change. The reason im really irritable is because in this case I feel like I have some blame in this breakup. I cant get over the fact that its too late to fix my mistakes. Do you honestly think that he will ever come back to me in spite of the bad if I go fully NC? Someone please advise me on my situation I would gladly appreciate it. I dont know what else to think!

[SapphireNoir10]

Sounds like the relationship was over a long time before it actually was. If you were to look at it...how much percent of the time was it good and how much was it bad?

 

With me and my boyfriend we're probably good 90% of the time and ok/disagreeing 10% of the time. Now if it ever got to the point of the good being the minority percentage I think we'd both know to walk away.

 

I think you need to let him go. He is over it and the damage is done. Im sure you both made mistakes but in the end you just were not compatible. Stay strong and keep your head up and in time it will get better.

 

SOmetimes distance and time makes us look at things with rose coloured glasses. Think back, was it REALLY so great? was he really so great?

 

I would go NC.