I just need people to know my story, and help if they can. dont judge

[softball4923]

My boyfriend and i have been on and off for about four years now. I am a senior in high school and we started talking in 8th grade. It was never anything serious just flirting alot, and texting each other. Then freshmen year we dated for about half the year, and broke up before summer vaction. I am always busy with softball so i never really got to see him. Suddenly he starts dating this new girl from a different school. I dont want to say she is a but she has had sex with 5 guys before she dated him. I never actually met her, i just instantly didnt like her because she stole him from me.

every year my town throughs a Freinds and Neghibors day and he was gonna be there so i texted him, and said i wanted to hang out. When i saw him, he told me that his girlfriend and them had sex, and he fingered her, and that she might be pregannt. I was so mad, but i tried not to show it. Later i was flirting with him touching his hand then grabbing his fingers then he said, That's the one i fingered her with." I let go and walked home

 

Then they broke up, and i told him i wanted to get back together we did. 4 hours later he texted me, and said Brittany (his ex) just came over and he wanted to kiss her. I said what do u want me to say to that? He said i stilll love her, and want to be with her. I said fine, and hung up. A few weeks later we had a confrence scrimmage volleyball game, and of course her school was in my conference. I texted my ex, saying oh i get to see your girlfriend today (which i still had no idea what she looked like or who she was) he said i know she told me she has already seen you. Well, we creamed them in the game, but she didnt even play, too bad. Acouple weeks later they broke up and havent dated since.

 

My sophmore year of track sucked because i saw her at every track meet. She is a grade younger then us. She would always talk to him when i was doing long jump or running. Shed ask how is your mom or how are you and your gf. Then my bf and i were in a tent at the meet and he was in the tent i was outside of it talking to him, and brittany walked by and he said hi and smiled like crazy. It just pissed me off because i am right here HELLO u dont need to talk to that hoe. I left him, and didnt talk to him for the rest of the night.

 

Let me skip junior year because this is getting really long. We have went on break three times, and we are currnetly on one right now. First time we went on break he started dating this girl, and said she makes me happy. Then she broke up with him and he came crawling back to me and i accpeted him. Second time we went on a break he didnt date her, but he hung out with the same girl all the time, but then we ended up being together again. The girl he goes to when we are on breaks has had 2 abortions, and is currently pregnant again. We are on a break now, and i told him if you leave me for her again i will never take you back again. He hasnt really still talks to her when he thinks im not around. But i told him i dont like when random girls write on your facebook wall then he said it doesnt matter, and we argues, then finally he delted every girl that he had as a friend. I was happy until i found out he had twitter because he was talking to alot of girls on it, and girls that bullied me.

 

I just still look at Brittanys profile everyday and see if anything changes. I look at his girls he use to call hot all the time because i just dont think im pretty enough or skinny enough for him. We dont hang out much anymore, and everytime i see him in the hallway he is talking to girls. We have three classes together, and we never talk. Everytime i see him he is with a girl it just makes me doubt him and not trust him. I know we are on break, but we are still techniqually together. I feel like i should get a new guy and get over him, but im scared i wont find anyone. I have less then 200 people in my high school. i dont want to go to my senior prom alone. I still like him, but he is just way to close with his girl friends. He calls me a because i called this girl a [ that he hung out with. He should either agree with me or not say anything because i should be the girl that matters the most to him. It also hurts me because i am still a virgin, and he had sex with Brittany. I told him i couldnt get over it, then he told me he lied about half of it. He said i didnt jizz and i pushed her off and it lasteed a minute, but the story changes everytime. I am just so hurt and confussed right now. I dont want to be a jealous but i feel like i am being one. ugghh its just alot, and idk what to do because he said he wants to have kids and get married, and be in the nfl but idk if i believe him. Ill quit writing and stop boring you , but help if you can. Any advice will help me.

[Nearbot]

You are SO young. You will have plenty of boyfriends later in life. This guy is a jerk. Have some self-respect and move on. I guarantee you will find someone else. High school relationships very, very rarely last. He doesn't want to marry you and have kids with you. He wants to be a teenage boy and experience life with lots of different girls.

[LDRohnos]

I know it's hard because when I was your age I had the blinders on as well and my vision stopped just shy of my nose, but what nearbot said is right. You have your whole dating life ahead of you still.

 

Honestly sex and relationships at your age to be it bluntly, sucks. I went through the same type of bs and it just isn't worth it. There are quite a few people that are ready for a relationship at your age and feelings are usually stomped on because nobody knows better. I agree he is being a jerk, instead I would just focus on other things such as your grades and friends. Think less about marriage and kids.

[LaKings55]

He's a jerk, but you're both immature. Let it go, walk away, and press on. Take the high road.