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So confused! Need help reading the signs! :(


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Okay so my ex and I broke up at the end of August, and since then things have been very weird. About two weeks he broke up with me he told a friend he was thinking of getting back with me, but was afraid the same problems would surface, so he never said anything to me. We tried to be friends, and talked some stuff through, then at a party I kissed a guy we both knew and he got very upset. We didn't talk for about three weeks, and disliked each other in that time.


I initiated a friendship after that and since then we have been very good. We text a couple times a week, and when we're around each other in groups, we're very flirty and always play fighting (something we did a lot before we dated). His sister has told me she would like to see us get back together. We hung out once, when he asked me to study, even though we ended up just talking the whole time, and spent a couple hours just laughing. He acts very different around me, he gets very excitable and hyper, and my friend commented that he's only like this when I'm around. His room mate and I hung out one day, and my ex ditched everything that day to spend time with us, and asked me for a massage, and hugged me and in general acted weird.


Recently I heard from a mutual friend that right after we became friends after not talking, he thought about hooking up with his other friend. But he decided not to do this because she'll be moving away, and that's all I've heard about that. And all his flirting and acting weird has happened after this, so I'm not sure what to think of that?


My friends have commented that we should just get back together again, but I don't know how he feels, so I don't want to bring it up. Not sure what to think about it all!

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It's still fairly new breakup..

as long as you still see each other you still have feelings for each other, and you might act the same way you did when you were dating. (this is quite normal - if you see each other regularly)


Did you still want to get back together?

If you do not want to get back together, I think the best option is try and distance yourself from him as much as you can. Try not to initate "play fighting or flirting" with him.. as he might get the wrong signals from you and vise-versa

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At the very least, there are left-over feelings. His concerns are valid, and you should have the same concerns: would the same problems surface? It sounds like there's enough of a foundation of friendship to try taking another step. If something starts to develop, talk about the problems you used to have, and try to figure out a solution to deal with them (if they're valid problems) and/or keep them from happening again (if they're destructive).


And bear in mind that there is the chance he has no interest other than flirting. If you think you can handle that level of rejection, it couldn't hurt.

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Update: I swallowed my pride and took my leap of faith but I did not get the results I was hoping for. I'm taking that as a sign that it's time to move on. I'm seeing him sometime this weekend probably, and we'll see how that goes, but I don't expect anything. As far as I'm concerned I'm just going to give up on this whole thing.

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What did you do in this leap of faith, lol? Its kind of needed if you want peoples opinions.


It seemed good from what I read. If anything, he might be a bit bitter from you kissing someone, and the power might have shifted a bit to your side, that he might find it hard to initiate now. Thats how I would feel if i saw someone i might be interested in getting back with... kissing another dude. I would feel in less of control of the situation, and in a way... feel dumped in return (hence why some people play the party/have fun after a breakup card on facebook).

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