strange dreams

[UniqueSoul]

Hey everyone,

within the last few months ive been dealing with a lot of emotions. I dated someone in 2007 until 2009, who ended up cheating on me with his ex, lying about so much, and really putting me in an awful position. I jumped into dating right away after this relationship ended..(i know this was a bad idea) i ended up getting into a relationship with a man in 2010..only lasting 8 months, and then 2 months later, i ended up in another relationship..this is my current relationship, and I have been dating this man for 17 months. Since this past august ive had a lot of free time on my hands and ive had ALOT of time to think. i think that all this time has caused all those repressed feelings of past relationships to come out..and i find myself struggling with what is real in the present, compared to what was real in the past. Certain situations that come up in my current relationship trigger memories of the past relationships (usually the bad one that lasted 2 years) and i blow up the situation in my head, and make it a huge deal. Its very complicated, so im sorry if it is confusing.

recently ive been having dreams about my ex from 2007...that we are still dating, but i am so unhappy, and i just cant wait to wake up. Ive posted on here before about my relationships, but now these dreams are happening, and its so strange and frustrating.

I feel like im growing further and further away from the man i am with now, and that is not what i want to happen. I want to be able to let the past go and move on, without therapy.

anyone have similar stories that can help?

 

Thanks--

[SpottiOtti]

I have been in exactly your shoes. I was in a terrible relationship when I was 17 til I was 20 or so. The guy cheated on me, among other awful things. Then I dated someone for a year, then another guy for three years, then another guy for a year and a half. And I did the exact same thing you're doing, dreams and all. I only began to recover, to heal, and to put everything in its place after I was single for two years. Your mind wants to do the same thing, but you are distracted because you are invested emotionally in someone else. I suppose if you don't want to be single (you probably don't want to break up with this guy), maybe you could first enlist his help. If he is your partner, you guys should have each other's backs. Then, maybe you could set aside some time each day to deal with the old relationship. Maybe journal or something. Just force yourself to remember and to deal with all the things you were trying to avoid when you jumped into these relationships.

[UniqueSoul]

thank you so much.

[HannahLynn]

Wow, when i read this, i felt like i had wrote it. I also dated someone for many years, he was a cheater/liar/psycho. About 4 months later got into a 6 month long relationship. After that i was single for almost 2 years, and felt better than ever. But, now that im very far into my current relationship, i find that im having dreams about my ex's, as well as feeling very emotional and confused.

 

Counseling. GO if you can. Seriously, it will do wonders for you. Its amazing and can ease alot of stress. Im still not 100% but getting there.

[In the Dark]

Sounds like you're covering up the past by getting into relationships asap.

Once you get comfortable and stable within a new LTR relationship, the last significant one or relationship which effected you emotionally will comeback rising to the surface to haunt you.

 

Your dreams may pass eventually.

Possibly something triggered them that you may not know of.

It cahn even be small things which make you remember.