Deckard Posted October 18, 2011 Share Posted October 18, 2011 Well, I spent some time here in 2008/9 as I crawled out of the hell of 2.5 years of dysfunction with the woman I love. I got a long way out (8 months NC) only to walk right back in after she reached out with an "I'm nothing without you" text. And now here I am again. 2 years later. Alone. Broken. But not beaten. I had the courage to love her; but more courageous still was the soul-rupturing decision to say No More. Put simply, so powerful was my addiction that I consistently accepted behavior (lies, cheating, abuse, ...) from her that was at odds with who I am in all other aspects of my life: friend, father and man. In the end, to continue to do that would mean my ruination. So I carved that cancer out of my life (3 months stone-cold NC) and I offer this covenant (which I recite whenever the craving starts to stir) to those other of you who are on the path out of addiction to another. Hopefully it will offer some peace and support: I am a recovering addict, Each day my addiction grows weaker, Each day my soul’s voice grows clearer. Nothing she does or is done to her Will cause me to alter my course. I am a warrior, I am beautifully broken, I own the whole of me: black/white; light/dark; virtue/perversity. And my spirit will never be extinguished. I will honour this dark night, I will not falter in its flame, And I will emerge whole to greet the dawn. This I covenant. Link to comment
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