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AAAAHHHHH! Why can't I shake this? Am I just neurotic?


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Well, for anyone who has read a couple of my posts.....I feel ridiculous. My ex and I had been emailing everyday for over a month. I was not the one who started the communication (never am), but I certainly was reciprocating. I was getting frustrated because I felt like I couldn't figure out his intentions and things were on his terms.....he could wait days to answer me but he would write, IM, if he didn't get a response relatively quick. I kind of reached the end of my tether and sent him an email saying that i was tired of it and we couldn't be friends. I really just wanted a chance to talk. As in my last post. He definitely got angry with that email and did something spiteful. I just feel like i'm never going to get my closure. I know this should be closure enough. Should I call, write? Why can't I let it go? I know that he would have handled this differently if he really wanted me in his life....that's what my head says. Why can't my heart listen? I feel so helpless #-o

Please help.

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When we end a relationship, we always feel like there is more to be said, things to resolve, etc. And we may get that chance - just not today.

 

Go back to NC and set a goal with it (a month? two?). This doesn't mean you can't talk in the future, but for now, it's not doing much for your healing, right?

 

Consider yourself having the closure already, as you said.

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Trust me, what you are going through is normal. THE only way you can start healing is full NC. Everytime you talk you remember one thing or another, have more questions or thoughts and you keep holding yourself back from moving on. I broke up last week after finding out she was stringing me along for months while tying to see where her "friend" relationship goes. Its beyond painful and hard not to keep talking, but its the only way you will slowly stop asking more questions and digging further into it. As you have seen you will never get the email or response you want from your ex so what good is it to keep dragging it along. Be strong and try your best to move on. Come to ENA and post whatever you want to say to him, but avoid contact. It will take quite some time to let it go without a doubt, it feels like forever, but we all move on eventually.

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